My DD7 has moments like this. It is always so discouraging and upsetting as a parent to see your child behave this way and have that moment of "wow, my kid might be a jerk." I usually (try to) calmly remind her that it's ok to be frustrated when something is tough or a task is new and confusing, but it is never ok to scream and throw fits. She has shown some improvement over the last year. Or maybe I've just gotten tougher about telling her she may not get out of control or she will need to stop the task and take a break.
I also tend to tell myself that this seems to be a form of rage to master. There is a positive side to this behavior-- she has what I call "the tenacity gene." She wants the challenge, she is determined to conquer it, and she will not give up. Those are positive things. It's just so difficult in the moment to remain firm and calm when she is falling apart and lashing out at me or other family members.
My only advice is to keep fighting the good fight.
