"...intolerance for formal instruction..."
Well, this is just my opinion, which carries no particular authority, as it is based on my experience with one child. But looking around, I think that school is often a mismatch these days for boys, period. All boys, and especially gifted boys. Gifted boys with wonky cognitive profiles more than anyone. I think that school is a poor fit for boys up until about middle school, when they have the maturity and EF skills to do what is asked of them. Before that, the tasks that schools ask them to do are often not all that developmentally appropriate. Many boys (especially gifted or 2e boys) can't do these tasks, and then they get labeled as problems, and then they internalize that label... Maybe our job as parents if we have one of these kids is to protect them as much as possible until they get a little older and everyone can see how awesome they are.
