I'm so sorry for your pain and isolation. I hear your frustration at the lack of answers from school and how that has carried over into your adult life. Have you read any of the Dabrowski materials on over-excitabilities and positive disintegration? Some of what you are describing reminds me of that work.
Practically speaking, I'm also crossing a professional crossroad in my life regarding pursuing higher education in the humanities/English versus attending law school.
As a recovering attorney, I have to ask why law school? I can't tell you how many attorneys I know who feel trapped in their jobs. The most common question that I get from other attorneys who learn that I left the profession is not why?, but how? Check out some of Jonlaw's posts on this forum.
I want to first assess the suspicion I have regarding a possible learning disorder and set up a plan for tackling this before any kind of graduate classes. Additionally, I don't want to bite off more than I can intellectually chew and wind up overwhelmed academically.
This sounds like a good idea. You obviously are struggling with these questions and the old school data raises questions and doesn't provide answers. A professional may be able to look at that information and use it figure out what testing is appropriate.
Maybe I am just not that smart--someone has to fall in those 124-127 IQ scores that are undeniably painfully close to the cutoff but just do not meet it.
I actually think that many attorneys would fall in that range. I think that you greatly over-estimate the average IQ of the profession as a whole.
I guess I'm most confused about the 7th grade test. I was performing with complete mediocrity at that time and was actually very much more interested in trying to fit in and survive socially than with school. I hadn't been tested since 3rd grade and that score was very low due to my bubbling error. Why do you guys think they tested me individually and then never spoke to me? It just doesn't make sense.
I know that this may be difficult to hear. I think that you need to let go of this. No matter how much you try to analyze this, it is just something that you will never know. Is it possible that the school shared the information with one of the adults in your life? Have you ever asked them?
