She frequently does this sort of thing when asked questions we’re pretty sure she knows—she skates around the answer, or takes the question too literally on purpose, or does any number of other things to avoid giving you the correct answer because she finds it entertaining. And I suppose I can see that making her regurgitate things she knows—like we’re quizzing her—might seem pointless to her, maybe? So my concern is—how do I go about teaching her? It doesn’t seem like standard kindergarten curriculum is going to cut it. But at the same time, she seems impatient with some skills that are pretty fundamental (for example, she likes writing capital letters, but refuses to write lowercase—she will trace them, but not write them. So we need to slow her down so she can develop the dexterity needed, while her brain wants to zip on ahead because the task is boring.)
Welcome about the Asynchrony Train with a sly, socially adroit, and (somewhat) oppositional/autonomous child.
My DD was doing this sort of thing as far back as we can remember. She never learned skills so that she could show them off-- for anyone, at any time, or CERTAINLY on command.
She would deliberately AVOID compliance with a demand to "show me" _______. The nearest explanation that I can offer is that she seemed to feel that this was
insulting her intellect. Even as a baby. She'd kind of roll her eyes internally as if she were thinking "What am I? A trained SEAL?? Ooooo-- gonna gimme a
fish if I do?"
Then she'd do exactly what your kiddo does-- dance ALL around answers or skills, and laugh-laugh-laugh at the ever-increasing frenzy of those asking her. Non-compliant doesn't begin to cover this behavior, does it? LOL.
Like some of the others, we set up a home-Montessori environment for her when she was about 3.5 yo, after looking into some local preschools and getting shown the waiting list (long long story, related to 2e, not GT)...
after she learned to read at about age 5, though, the world abruptly opened like a shucked oyster. She went from "clearly bright" to intellectually insatiable and rapidly outpacing anything we tried. Seriously-- she would burn through a year's worth of "complete curriculum" in just a few days or weeks, and I had no idea how she was doing it. It still mystifies me, that process.
We did a bunch of different homeschooly things with her-- but most of the time, I was scrambling to keep the beast fed, quite honestly. Charlotte Mason worked well for a while at ages 4-6.
I don't KNOW that I'd write off regular schooling just yet-- it's possible that your child will enjoy the social aspects just fine, and tolerate the rest with reasonable grace...
er.
Well, okay-- I'd say that you have reasonable evidence already that the latter is unlikely. Speaking as parent to one of this particular model, I mean.
You're probably going to have your hands full reining in her impulses to manipulate those around her for entertainment. I strongly encourage active teaching of empathy and compassion-- and RESPECT for the feelings and autonomy of others. REALLY strongly encourage that with this type of child.
My DD is now 14, and she's still quite a handful, but she's also not got a mean bone in her body, and is well-liked by almost everyone who knows her. She's also very eager to begin college next fall.
