I really appreciate everyone's responses - every little bit helps. I didn't really mean for this to turn into a discussion only on acceleration, but I'll go with that for now.
The comments from others have come up in the context of testing and research. I've spoken with the ped and other professionals to get recommendations for testing and they ask why. Well, because I'm evaluating my daughter's learning environment and investigating how to best support her intellectual needs - accleration is part of that picture. Hard not to talk about it.
The ped, whose DS is identified as gifted, immediately describes my daughter as too emotionally immature, based on the behavior issues we've had this school year. I perceive those behavior issues as mostly gifted related and to a lesser degree DD's emotional OE, maybe I'm just making excuses.
I've tried to discuss GT options with other GT parents and the teacher of the GT pull-out (whose DS has been accelerated 1 grade and is currently in middle school). I've also talked around discreetly to try and identify 1st grade and 2nd grade teachers that would or would not be a good fit for my DD6. All those discussions lead to the pull-out as the only option because 1)the school is not interested in skipping or 2)the parents are not interested (although they've struggled all year with a poor fit with their DC and the teacher) or 3)what will you do in middle school school and high school when she is younger than everyone else.
I know the answer to No. 3 (I'm more interested in finding a solution to the problem my DD has right now than a problem that may or may not even be a problem in 4-6 years) and that usually ends the discussion, but I can't respond to No. 2 - everyone has to make that decision for their own DC. Still working on No. 1; as I referred to before am working the Iowa manual to try and layout a reasonably objective evaluation.
One other comment we've had is that DD6 should be with other like ability same age children rather than older kids. I agree absolutely, and would love to place her in the GT magnet school in the adjacent district. They only start in 2nd grade, would need to get an exemption since we are out of their district. Therefore not an option for next year, unless we get a waiver and a skip - not likely.
I suspect my DD is more along the MG/HG side of things, but she is desperate to learn - soaks everything up like a sponge, synthesizes it and cycles it back out days or weeks later in some other context. I would decribe her as more global than subject specific, but that need to know is a driving force and it's generally not being met in her regular classroom
She is currently attending a science based nature camp and begs to continue going there rather than the other summer program with her best friend. That other program goes on daily field trips roller skating, swimming and to movies. The only field trip that she is willing to bail out on the science camp is to Busch Gardens!
I remember my personal experience, long ago though it was. The ones who were eager to learn at 5, 6, 7 yo didn't get the opportunity to do so in school and by the time many got the opportunity they either didn't care or had found other ways to feed that need. I've heard it gets easier after about 2nd or 3rd grade when they are better able to 'feed' themselves, but I've got to get her there still hungry, without emotional damage, and without a bad reputation for her emotional OE that she cannot yet control (we are working on it, but it's a work in progress).
Someone in another thread mentioned a coworker saying "What about all those bright kids who turned out fine with no extra accomodations" or something to that effect. My response is - what about all those bright kids who didn't. I know personally more than a few who either fell through the cracks altogether or had to take a long, hard, twisted road to get where they finally got. I know I can't save her from everything, but this is fundamental.
Homeschool is not an option for us - I work full time as the primary breadwinner and I do not have the appropriate tempermant - I love my DD6 dearly, but we already rub each other the wrong way much too often (I am so not looking forward to those teenage years!).
