today when I picked him up, she told me that I really need to stop doing these activities with him because "the repercussions were showing up in the room" -
Whatever you decide about curriculum, I think that this issue does need to be addressed. Maybe you could talk to her about how you think it's important for your son to pursue what interests him and how you believe that fits with the essential Montessori philosophy. Give her some articles that explain that what you are doing at home is not "pushing" him. And talk about how ideally you would like him to be able to extend what he learns at home with activities at school. Try to make it sound like a partnership between you and her rather than you demanding that she does something extra for him. At least, that's how I envision the ideal teacher
I could go to her and say that DS has been working on multiplication at home and she would offer some multiplication activities. Of course, you may have to look for some materials yourself--it sounds like you are already thinking along those lines.
My guess is that she thinks you are pushing and skipping important things. I know that our vice-principal advised me not to skip DS because "he wouldn't learn phonics". Actually, he already knows phonics, but I don't think she really gets that. In her mind, he is missing it because he "skipped" it.
Cathy
