Thank you very much everyone, life took over for a bit there.
Wolf had his meeting (a modified SST I think it was) and we were basically told that since he isn't working at least 2 years below his age that they weren't going to do anything for him. Okay, the OT did give us some suggestions and will give us some support, but no testing or diagnosing or anything like that. In fact I was told that he's doing fine for a second grader (even without the skip he'd be in 3rd which they ignored). They also ignored the fact he's been in a formal schooling situation for 4 years and is still having these problems. AND on top of all of that the phrase "If he'd been in a regular classroom..." was repeated ad nauseum even after I had explained repeatedly that he's been with a credentialed teacher from age 5 and has done everything a kid in a regular classroom would have done, just at a faster rate. There was a lot of "he's so bright why are you worried if he is working above level in most areas" and "You should just slow him down and let him catch up."
Needless to say I resorted to massive amounts of tongue biting to survive the meeting. No IEP, no testing, no 504... He's just "not far enough behind," never mind the fact it stresses him out so much he's been losing weight!
What I got out of it (mostly from the OT, the other two seemed to have no interest in helping at all) was that at the minimum he has fine motor skill delay of at least a year which may or may not be the cause of what looks like dysgraphia or dyslexia. He also can't do transfers from one paper to another so we are switching to direct transfer work until he gets better with that. He's also going to be doing drawing and coloring, basketball and catch to help with left/right processing.
We are low income so actual testing with a neuropsych is going to be an issue. I'm in contact with his pediatrician to see if she has any suggestions and will be calling their insurance to see what might be covered. I just need to know what's going on so I can help him because if it's dyslexia that's different than dysgraphia which is different from simply fine motor delay. Argh. Sorry, this was a bit ranty.
