I've learned a lot about parenting a very literal kid - how to be specific in my directions with him, how best to diffuse misunderstandings with a teacher who doesn't understand his literalness, and how to be patient when he says things that others would interpret as rude and help him learn to reword sometimes to be more polite.
But I am amazed at how poor I still am at not recognizing when an attitude or behavior might be due to his literal interpretation of something.
Tonight he was expressing how he didn't think he should have to be nice to a certain student at school who has been rather obnoxious to him. In frustration, I finally told him that I was really concerned about his attitude that he only had to be nice to kids that were nice to him - that life didn't work that way. He looked quite confused and said, "But that is what our principal has told us every day since kindergarten."
That didn't sit quite right, so I asked him when the principal had said this. "Every morning at the end of announcements. He says, '... and remember, treat others the way you want them to treat you."
Ok. That didn't clear it up for me, so I asked how that meant he could be mean to some kids. "Because. They hear the same rule every day. So if this is how they are to me every day, that is how they want to be treated."
When the lightbulb finally turned on, we were able to have a conversation about what it actually meant.
And all this time, I've been worrying about this attitude, and it was because he thought that was the rule.
I have got to get better at asking him more questions that I just wouldn't ask my other kids.