The first time I ran into an intellectual "peer" I was around 15, I figured out a few years later that he was a sociopath. It was cool to have someone to engage with intellectually and his extreme behaviors and actions were fascinating and we had many interests in common. At the time I considered him a friend.
But sociopaths don't have friends. So, if you have a friend who you think is a sociopath, one of those two assumptions is false.
Indeed.
This is a lesson that my 13yo DD is (very sadly for her) learning is also the case with a Malignant Narcissist, as well.
There
are no other people in a Narcissist's world, only those who provide narcissistic supply and those who are "not useful." The latter category is mostly those who have already been used or have no obvious purpose in fulfilling a Narcissist's endless needs for seeing him/herself as singularly amazing in every possible way.
I might add that Narcissists of the cerebral variety tend to view younger PG children as either severe threats to be eliminated/crushed or... as the ULTIMATE codependents, if they can just be molded into narcissistic mirrors by destroying personal boundaries and creating an extension of the narcissist. This is accomplished through a sophisticated, slow program of seduction, bewildering manipulative 'gaslighting' and ultimately cycling abandonment/abuse.
Neither thing is very healthy or beneficial for the other person. Obviously. This is a gross understatement, by the way. Narcissists are incredibly skillful, manipulative predators.
Don't even ask how I know this. Truly. It's a horrible, long, and very painful story. Suffice it to say that I predict that a significant amount of my child's coming year is going to be spent in therapy.
Also wanting to add, here, that I am an only child and so is my daughter. Both of us are significantly more altruistic and empathetic than her father (my spouse) who has a sibling. In fact, it was my child's soft boundaries and kindness that made her such an attractive target of someone predatory.
