Thank you for all your insight. I can't believe I did not think of the sensory issues myself, how embarassing. This is a child that greatly disliked the feeling of grass on her toes as a toddler, struggles with swimming because of the feeling of water in her nose and on her face, and who had dysphagia as a baby connected to the structure of solid food. I thought she had outgrown the sensory stuff, but maybe I'm wrong.
I certainly think her need for independency and the power struggle are big issues too that are exacerbated by school stress.
This afternoon was such a great relief after school ended. I had a happy girl who was skipping and laughing and talking next to me while we had 4 hours of mommy-daughter time that she craved. I am looking forward to the rest of the vacation since I expect it to be a good family time, with little to no daughter issues.
Lesson learnt- and tonight's dinner battle was avoided. She chose not to eat her soupy meal tonight and will eat it for breakfast instead. She'd rather feel hungry. It's not ideal but she made a fully informed decision and did not even try to negotiate.
Sometimes I forget that she is only 5 and am suddenly reminded of it when she has drawn her name on the wall in chapstick and claims her doll did it...
You all help me feel less lonely in this confusing world of giftedness.
