@CCN
That is why during the parent interviews (prior to parents even applying to the school) the principal makes it clear that it's a 'package deal' and if you don't want your kids going on the trips than don't apply.
At least there's that... It's good that they're clear about it. If you have a doctor's note, though, citing an exceptional circumstance... I don't think they can force your DD.
I do agree with the other posters about enabling anxiety, though... mind you, there's a line between gently pushing them out of their comfort zone Vs. traumatizing them. It's such a tough call. I've walked this fine line with my DD her whole life. Sometimes I'm happy to have pushed her, other times I regret it, and still other times when I haven't pushed her I wonder what would have happened if I had. I've tried to push her without being too extreme (like, just past that comfort zone so she can "look back and still see it" if you know what I mean). She's really come a long way.
It's interesting that your DD has already gone on a trip and still has anxiety (this would happen with my DD too - while sometimes being put in an anxiety provoking situation would result in "phew! what was I afraid of?" still other times it would create more anxiety and trepidation towards a repeat experience).
Maybe you could have more conversations about the last trip, like "what were you worried about?" and "did what you worried about actually happen?" and "do you see how you are fine and everything turned out fine?" etc etc.
I also agree with Evemomma that this situation is tricky because it's prolonged anxiety... so is that pushing her too far? Particularly since the anxiety has persisted even after a previous successful trip? (Or does it just require gradual and multiple attempts for desensitization?) Not sure...
An example off the top of my head (there are many, lol): I pushed my DD to go through with her turn to read the school announcements over the intercom system, and while she succeeded, she never wanted to do it again, and that was only about 45 seconds (plus whatever lead-up anxiety she felt). I don't think it helped, and ultimately culminated with her hiding behind her teacher's desk when it was her turn to do an in-class presentation. (sigh). THIS year, however, she's been able to do another presentation without fleeing and hiding (yay!!!). Not sure why... a delayed reaction to multiple times of being pushed, or simply a result of aging and maturation?
Sorry... I know that doesn't help much... there's no clear cut answer. I'd try and get a doctor/counselor's note, though, just in case you feel like you need it.
