"Full on since birth," accidentally hurting others/breaking things, having to repeat instructions, hyperfocus-these are all classic ADHD symptoms. ADHD is formally diagnosed through behaviors observed at home and school. ADHD kids typically have low working memory and processing speed on the WISC as well so that is consistent.
I am a little confused about the dyscalculia. Do you observe math-related difficulties in her schoolwork?
The disparity between your DD's working memory and processing speed and her perceptual ability is huge. She has a tremendous bottleneck of her ability by slow processing and much lower working memory. This has to be so frustrating for her. Untreated ADHD compounds this bottleneck as well. No wonder she is so unhappy!
I can't answer your other questions but I am sure others will ring in on those. Good luck with the paed aapointment.
