I CAN get better, you are where I was four years ago. Each year gets slightly better than the last, but they're never the same as the vast majority of their age peers. I think the goal is to keep them on a good track until they find their niche. So much easier said that done, of course!
Even the time-out situation sounds familiar! I used to get so irritated when a neighbor used to go on about our next-door neighbor's daughter who was sooo good, sooo perfect blah blah blah and how when she was a toddler, her mother used to tell her to sit on the bottom step to take a time out, the girl would go there, sit for the duration, and be "fixed" (this perfect girl is now off in college and from her online presence quite the party girl and not shy with her tweets!!)
This is my practical non-clinical advice (I don't want to advise about the testing etc., there are others who are more expert at that):
Concentrate on a good school fit, and don't force a bad fit over a long period of time. This has been super hard for us and ongoing.
Look into DYS when he's 5 or so, don't wait too long because the testing data will "expire".
Put ALOT of time/money/energy into his passions (I'm sure he has them) as they come and go and try to share with him, find other kids to be with who have some of these things in common. This is probably one of the most important things you can do for his intellectual development and self-esteem.
Try to connect him safely with lots of different adults in the world of his passions (for my DD it's pretty much settled into science, LEGOs/architecture, animals, and singing...) Museum classes are always a good bet to try, or any get-togethers with a local or regional gifted association. You'll learn to really see a tremendous difference in how people will talk to him and react to him in different environments.
Ignore all dirty, stern looks and comments from people who have absolutely no idea what it's like to live with and raise a child like this (this can include relatives, friends, neighbors as well as complete strangers).
Embrace any compliment or advice from people who've been there or can see his potential, even if it's just a blip of an encounter from a stranger.
Take time for yourself. Doesn't have to be a fancy ordeal, you just need to do your favorite relaxing thing and not have to worry about where your child is, how he's doing, etc. (this is why it's hard for me to regenerate/regroup during school hours).
Even though it's so hard to be on the receiving end of this intensity, he's a big-intellect kid in a little body and it really is hard for him. In my opinion, that intensity is there as part of the package to power him along in his journey, whatever it's meant to be.
Enjoy him and work on being his best champion and it will definitely pay off.
