Has he been thoroughly evaluated for Apserger's? As a parent of an AS child, problems with regulating attention, getting overwhelmed and irritated easily, poor fine motor/coloring skills, and having rigid expectations for rules that can result in emotional outbursts when those expectations are violated sure sounds a lot like it bears close investigation to me.
A lot of times, symptoms of Asperger's in gifted kids are written off as "gifted quirks" instead of being recogized for what they are.
"Misdiagnosis and Dual Diagnosis of Gifted Children and Adults" is a good resource for clinicians and parents that helps clarify the differences between signs of giftedness and signs of ADHD, autism spectrum disorders, OCD, etc., and also describes what these disorders look like and how they manifest when they occur in gifted people.
