This has been a useful thread for me on a very basic level. Hearing the resonance of shared experiences has helped me better understand my own kids and helped me make peace with the idea that maybe I didn't fail as a mom despite often not understanding what my kids were going through.
acculady & deacongirl - I think I may fall into gifted in written expression but otherwise, I think it's likelyjust above average, not gifted. And I think my ability to adapt, play the game, and "fit in" made my life in school so much easier than it's been for my kids. I don't have, at least in my own opinion, a lot of the telling points of gifted traits, so that's where I'm coming from. As a mom, especially with my first child, it made it very difficult to empathize and help a child who not only would not "play the game" to make her life easier but at times seemed incapable of "just fitting in" at school. With my next two kids, I'd learned a bit more and stopped trying to "fix" my kids when they were little and spent more time advocating for a better fit for them at school.
kikiandkyle - I've spent over two decades as a stay at home mom. They have been such a blessing to me and my family. Don't spend any energy at all on regret of what you didn't do in the past. Savor your place in life now and start finding ways to nurture yourself creatively, whether it is through taking a cooking class, starting a blog about cooking or some other topic, or delving into organic gardening and joining a local group with similar interests. Start a degree online if your kids are still at home; a friend of ours just graduated with an engineering degree he earned one class at a time.
I've found creative ways to blend being at home with finding some professional satisfaction by starting home-based businesses as well. The first was freelance writing, and you don't need a degree - just some time to learn the ropes and the ability to research info, interview, and put it together. Have you considered pitching articles to publications that cover topics you like to read about and have some expertise in? I'm now running a tech startup that is still based in my home, not only does it save money on costs, it lets me be home when my kid is out o f school. Find what you're passionate about and find a way to blend it into your current life.
