Our DD was wonderfully well-behaved at restaurants as a toddler, and she received a number of compliments as a result. At one restaurant in particular where we were regulars, DD used to attract a number of genuine smiles from the staff, and brief visits from other staff members who weren't assigned to our table.
Unlike the writer of that article, though, we clued in pretty quickly that DD hated the high chair (though she would only throw her toys to the floor in protest). Before she was 1yo she was sitting next to us in the booth. Having wiggle room did wonders for her behavior.
French parents want their kids to be stimulated, but not all the time. While some American toddlers are getting Mandarin tutors and preliteracy training, French kids are—by design—toddling around by themselves.
This isn't a comment about French/American parenting, it's a comment about allowing children unstructured play time by themselves versus helicopter parenting. Perhaps the author has spent too much time in France soaking up gross generalizations about how parenting happens in the US.
the French ideal of the cadre, or frame, that French parents often talk about. Cadre means that kids have very firm limits about certain things—that's the frame—and that the parents strictly enforce these. But inside the cadre, French parents entrust their kids with quite a lot of freedom and autonomy.
Authority is one of the most impressive parts of French parenting—and perhaps the toughest one to master. Many French parents I meet have an easy, calm authority with their children that I can only envy. Their kids actually listen to them. French children aren't constantly dashing off, talking back, or engaging in prolonged negotiations.
Hurr, durr, authoritative parenting.
I suppose it's lovely to envision that foreign cultures have secret wisdom to offer us, but all the writer is really revealing here is her own ignorance on the subject of parenting.
