First, I have to say a big thank you for the laugh that I got from your title, although I know it isn't funny for you. (I was just reading the CaringBridge update for the daughter of a family friend...a three year old with cancer, and was sobbing at my desk.)
Second, I have more empathy than solutions, since this sounds like my DS (3 years 10 months). I've had the same thoughts myself many times. We don't allow a lot of "screen time" (maybe 30 minutes a day) but I've found that the TV, computer, V-reader, etc., can keep him quiet. We also use the V-Reader and/or LeapPad for longer car rides when we just need a little bit of quiet. (Of course the toys make noise.)
Good luck...and like so much with kids, this too shall pass!
