I think that you've received a lot of good advice. I think that if you can access a psychologist who has experience working with gifted kids it makes sense at this point. The only thing that I would like to add is that you might want take a look at
http://www.sengifted.org/articles_counselin/Webb_MisdiagnosisAndDualDiagnosisOfGiftedChildren.shtml and also read the book which the article is based on
http://www.amazon.com/Misdiagnosis-Diagnoses-Gifted-Children-Adults/dp/0910707642 I find this forum routinely perserves my sanity. I get so much from reading about everyone's experiences that I would like share a bit.
I am homeschooling a very strong willed, defiant child DD7 and I have a DS3 who has absorbed a lot of the craziness since birth. It's heartbreaking for everyone, but things are getting better. I'm not sure whether or not my DD7 is 2E. We live in a reasonably remote part of Canada and I am not comfortable with the services that we can access locally. I do hope to have my DD7 evaluated at some point, but we will need to travel and we can't afford it right now. In a way this has been a blessing because I have had to figure things out on my own. This continues to be tremendous work. Homeschooling DD7 was emotionally draining for the first year. Almost daily I ended up in tears and felt like I couldn't do it, but I also couldn't put her back into school because I knew that it wasn't going to work either (we don't have many options). I assumed that 'homeschooling' was going to be a really fun and relaxed experience. I assumed that DD would actually want to do 'school work'. From day 1 it was a battle. She had meltdown after meltdown. She hit me, kicked me and screamed on and off all day. Sometimes I screamed back... but most often I ended up sobbing. In this process I feel that we destroyed a lot of trust. I didn't trust that she would ever be able to learn at home and she didn't trust that I was capable of helping her. She pushed buttons that I didn't even know that I had. Eventually she started to shut down, her interests in many areas disappeared. Her curiosity dwindled. She was no longer interested in 'everything' and instead her interests became extremely focused on 'fashion', which to this day I still personally struggle with LOL!
For me (and I am absolutely not implying that this is your situation) I had to admit that my vision of homeschool wasn't going to work. We tried a whole bunch of different approaches, including unschooling and nothing seemed to improve. I had to admit again and again that my approach was possibly never going to work. I blame myself, but I try to keep it in check because it really doesn't help. I just end up crying. Right now I am really focusing on gaining her trust and sparking her curiosity. As I am getting it back (little by little) she is becoming more receptive to doing 'school work'. We don't do a lot. She has a lot of control. Honestly, this part has been very hard for me to accept, but, my alternative is kicking and screaming.
My DD shows many signs of AS and ADHD, however, as our lives improve these signs are becoming less noticeable. I know that my initial approach to homeschooling was a 'bad educational fit', and this was a hard pill to swallow. Sometimes I wonder if I'm just getting really good at accommodation. Maybe I am, and if she ends up with a diagnoses, then we are on the right track. I think that eventually we will find it fun (maybe even relaxed). I just didn't anticipate that this would take years. Maybe this is where the rewarding part comes in...
