Hi,
I'm just after some thoughts on what to do for my dd5 who has reached a new level of worry. In the last week she has been terrified by the idea of her room setting on fire, and then the house (triggered the 'low fire danger' tag on her pjs), going blind, her head falling off (a toy's head fell off) and loosing her nose (there is a man in our community who has no nose). She has also hit a new level of compassion - for example, she was devastated when her dad squished an ant.
I feel very confident that this is due to a new level of awareness, plus a few changes in our family situation - she starts school in a few weeks and I recently returned to work (after looking after her full time - though she has been looked after by her dad or at friends houses rather than a carer when I've gone to work - but it is still a change) rather than any one significant event.
She is doing really well with some self talk. When she identifies something she's scared of we'll look at the facts of it - particularly after I stupidly said she wasn't going to loose her nose and of course she asked how I could say for sure. Fair question! So we've been looking at what causes fires for example and it has shown how safe we are and how low risk our situation is. We've talked about the reasons why someone might loose a nose (skin cancer etc) and how we can look after our skin, etc. - and how there are cosmetic surgery options if someone did. Poor little thing - I made a joke about the different kinds of noses on might choose - pelican... Pony... And she burst in to tears and said 'I just want my little nose'
We've been giving her an affirmation to say whenever she thinks the scary thought (I.e. 'it is very, very unlikely a fire could start in my room, so I don't need to worry), which has worked really well. But we have to prove it's true first. But I am wondering if anyone has any ideas on how to help her gently (may not be possible) expose her to the fact the world is full of potential hazards and that if we worry about them all we'll never cope!
We do tend to see more anxiety when she has brain spurts, but she's so overwhelmed at the moment and if I am honest, my husband and I are loosing patience. She can burst in to tears and be in consolable for half an hour + while we try to talk her down (multiple times a day). It's exhausting. I tend towards consoling her and helping her understand the situation and why it doesn't apply to her (though it is exhausting and by the end of the day my patience is pretty spent). My husband tends towards the 'harden the $&@? up approach' - though of course not in that language to her! Possibly we're completely confusing her and possibly one or both approaches are wrong. Happy for judgement.
I'm across OEs, but am wondering if it is possible to help her desensitise. When she doesn't have a scary thought she's one happy little camper.
Thanks
