I thought I'd share our experience with a fussy/non-eater, in case it sounds familiar to anyone reading...
DS was exclusively breastfed until he was 6mos, but was a wind and reflux inflicted baby until around 4mos, which the Ped. put down to a general case of colic. I continued to nurse DS until he self-weaned at 1yr, and he happily ate any sort of food we gave him in addition to the breastmilk.
At around 15mos he became what I'd call picky - literally picking through his meal, only eating the corn, for example, from his plate of vegies or only the pasta sheets from his lasagna. At about this time, he contracted a nasty case of gastro-entiritis from day care. This resulted in approximately 6 months of lactose intolerance, which the Ped. said could happen after severe gastro. It seemed feasible given that by age 2, he could tolerate dairy products again with no apparent reaction. The fussiness with food though, got progressively worse. By this stage, his diet resembled that of BigBadWool's son. The Ped. said that it was just a stage DS was going through, and was not at all concerned as DS appeared as a bright, energetic, tall-for-age child at all the follow up appointments.
We moved, and consequently had to see a new Pediatrician. He took one look at our then 3.5yo DS (who to this day continues to track 97%ile for height, 90%ile weight) and ordered blood work. Turns out our son is, not so surprisingly, very anaemic. We were immediately told to start DS on a high dose iron supplement, but at the 3 month review, his latest blood results showed no improvement at all. The Ped. was so surprised, he gently asked if I'd actually given DS the medicine! So, we did another 3 months with a higher dose and alas, still no change. DS is now having monthly blood tests as any lower, and he'll probably need a blood transfusion. As passthepotatoes mentioned, the Ped. has also indicated the link between food allergies and malabsorption so DS is also undergoing testing for these, with celiac disease the front-running possibility.
My point here is, if you feel that it's more than just normal childhood "fussiness" please see your doctor. As I said, DS has a normal appetite (just not nutritionally sufficient), is not failing to thrive and he appears to get through an 8hr day at Preschool just fine. The only symptoms he has is he's extremely pale, he tires very easily doing physical activity, and if he gets sick with anything, he gets very sick.
As a final bit of "food for thought" for any supporters of the idea that parents somehow create their children's food issues - I have two children. DD has been raised in the same environment as DS, with the same parenting style, and she has always had precisely ZERO issues eating meat, vegies or anything else we dish up.
