Major yes to everything OCJD said.
With respect to meds, DS15 started on them about a year ago. No miracle cures in our case, unfortunately, but they do seem to help (and we are still playing with type and dose to see if we can do better, as is unfortunately often the case with these). He's still got a whack of complex LD and zero executive function, but I think the meds are at least helping him be more able to learn how to cope with those weaknesses. While school is rough, there are definitely things he can do now that he absolutely couldn't a year ago.
As far as side effects, we've been lucky. He has always been bad at eating and sleeping (thus my reluctance to try the meds), but has been ok after a short transition each time we muck with the dose. He's actually sleeping better in the last few months than he has in years, as it turns out.
Avoidance is our bane (I've vented a *lot* about it here). It's a really tough habit to break, because it gives him a sense of safety. But you know, as I write this I am thinking "wait a sec, is this one of those intangibles that has changed over the last year?" I need to give this some thought, because I think maybe it actually has. Now that would be an effect of meds worth celebrating. I will ponder over (much more) coffee whether I can better identify/ articulate any change.
And I doubt it's any any consolation, but in our case DS and DH are extremely alike, and that seriously didn't help either.
Another good resource is
https://www.ADDitudemag.com . They have a lot of info about the inattentive form of ADHD, which tends to get short shrift in most resources. I didn't even know there was such a thing until I started researching my kids.
Lots of hugs and good luck!
