You have gotten some great responses! Frame it as "working to potential" and leave it at that.
DD11 is a A/B student that reads at 12+grade despite dyslexia. She is working with a private OG/Lindamood tutor because the child cannot spell to save her life. She has no phonemic awareness. And, she really doesn't read as a typical child does. She is a whole word reader with a photographic memory. Give her an unfamiliar word and she guesses. We have not experienced any negative responses from her school about the extra tutoring (that we pay for!). We want her to lessen her frustration and allow her to shine like we know she can. Her dysgraphia and ADHD all have accomodations, too. This is her dyslexia accommodation IMHO.
DS5 is hitting every requirement for grade primary. But, we have him seeing an OT for suspected dysgraphia and an SLP. He will start with the same OG/Lindamood tutor next year. We aren't even waiting for the diagnosis that we know he will get. I don't give a flying hairy care for what anyone thinks about how we support our kids at home. I am so disappointed in the lack of school support that I figure they have lost their right to an opinion when it comes to my kids. If they are going to leave me to figure it out on my own, than they can sit down and shut up about what we choose to do!!
