Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional Fustrated

I am a very fustrated single mother who sometimes wish her 15 year old son could just be like everyone else.

He was identified gifted in kindergarten. By the time he entered 3rd grade, he started showing difficulties in organization and following directions. Fourth grade was a horrible year. His teacher doubted he was gifted at all. He had extreme trouble keeping his desk clean and turning in assignments. It seemed as though he lost them within 5 minutes of recieving it. A horrible personality conflict arose between the teacher and my son and most of that year he was in ISS for not following directions. He completed all of states tests with 100% (which he could have done the begining of the year)and OLsaT placed him around 130. I was a teacher at this school also and lost all credibility as a mother and as a professional.

We moved. I began working for different district and my son went to another district. I didn't place him in the gifted program because, I didn't want the pressure of making him complete his work or listen to his teacher at school. (I didn't have much problems at home).

His 7th grade year, he wanted to be in the gifted program again. He took the new district's screening and was acepted quickly. This IQ test placed him at 140. He experienced extreme difficulties in his classes regarding deadlines, applying himself, quality, ..... a classic "underachiever". I thought perhaps, the past few years I had let him go by without studying that now, he was learning to put effort. I imagine it is difficult for a middle school teacher to monitor a student to write posted assignents in his agenda and to constantly lengthen due dates by a day for his procrastination.

His teachers in middle school didn't speak to me very much, but they seem to agree he belonged in the gifted brogram and did not see placing him in regular classes would benefit him. His grades were a rollar coaster...95+ or 50 for incomplete.

Towards the end of 9th grade, my son suggested to me that he may be ADHD. It had never occured to me, nor has any of his prior teachers suggested it. The common teacher remark was "does not apply himself" or basically a lazy underachiever.

The next part was hard... getting a proper diagnosis. Our family doctor thought it might be possible but he was honest about the difficulty of a dx because of his IQ. After two psychologist who found ADHD inconclusive we found an adolescent psychiatrist who made the dx.

There seems to be a lot of controversy over medicating gifted children for ADHD. I thought we would give it a try... he would probably be able to get meds when he was an adult anyway, why not subject him to my feedback while he still lived with me.

After the last grading period his grades were near perfect. His courses are mainly preAP or IB and humanities. Projects were completed on time with more depth, he participated constructively in discussions, and he caught up with 6 months of reading he said he skimmed in the past for his courses. A lot of his teachers are amazed. He did this all on his own accord without any of my helpt. That is the way he has always been.

Even with this experience, I'm faced with a lot of criticism I find hard to deal with. Criticism with being "one of those mothers" who force their child to be gifted and now medicating to exploit his talents. ADHD in my entire state seems to scream "behaviour problem", "poor parenting", or "medicating children so they'll become zombies".

Public education seems to service the majority and NCLB seems to put much focus on the lower end of the spectrum. What really happens to gifted students who are not obedient overachievers?