Lastly, does your DD have any challenging activities/hobbies? We used these as talking points frequently- again, great for reinforcing that everyone has things they need to work hard at or struggle with. For some kids, school is harder- talk about how it would feel to be the kid for whom school is hard, ask your DD for thoughts on how she can help either the kid or the group to function more smoothly, etc. .
This. We often use sports as talking points, because it is one thing in which they are ''average." I say things such as "how would you feel if C told you that he was better than you at soccer, and talked about how easy it is for him to score goals?" It is an ongoing conversation for us, so for example, last winter we talked about basketball, in the spring we used baseball,etc. It also gives us a chance to talk about the fact that some kids have to work harder than others at sports, some at school, some at music, etc.
Lately I have made a point to talk about the fact that even though it may take some kids longer to read (or learn math, etc) it doesn't mean that they won't know it AS WELL once they learn it. I think this is a very important message for my children to learn. We also talk a lot about not hurting others feelings by talking about things that they can't do yet, and especially about not criticizing others for taking longer to answer.
Honestly, I don't know the answer, though. Maybe also empathize with her that it must be frustrating, but help her learn how to guide the group to the answer without overtly shouting it at them? It is a skill that she will need in her career, eventually.
