Superintendent meeting was yesterday - well, sort of. I told Consultant I would really rather he speak to her alone if possible. I figured he could talk "superintendent to superintendent." Cut through all the nonsense and try to (finally) get something substantive done for DD.
So we got there and he asked to speak alone for a few minutes. New DSS was there and totally acting submissive and awkward, wouldn't make eye contact with us, scrambled to find a room where she could wait rather than be anywhere near me and DH. About 40 minutes later Consultant came out, smiling, and said "Let's get out of here and grab a cup of coffee." DH and I never entered superintendents office.
Apparently they dispensed with the principal's outrageous behavior pretty quickly. "I am aware of it and am addressing it. Obviously I expect my staff to behave in a professional manner at all times. I can't discuss it but I am aware of it and am addressing it." Consultant told her "the parents understand that." He said superintendent appreciated that we handled it this way. However this opened up the opportunity for him to explain why this situation absolutely cannot continue. The parents feel disrespected and cannot trust the district. It is unfortunate because the district is spending a lot of money and providing a lot of services but this situation simply cannot continue. "We just had 6 hours of [IEP meetings] involving 12 people all to review and implement a simple AT eval. And that is going to happen with everything. This cannot keep happening."
So after indicating that he has tried to work with new Director of Pupil Personnel Services "but she's too green - she doesn't understand how to make it work" he went on to walk superintendent through step-by-step how to arrange for the OOD placement DD needs. He spelled it all out - including how to word things so the district is protected. He pointed out that this is the very last attempt before we bring in the spec ed lawyer. "And you know [lawyer] - he'll come in and work his magic and you will end up agreeing. You know that. This is the last chance we have to save both the district and the parents unnecessary legal fees. Wouldn't you rather spend that money on the child?" Oh, and the district's attorney is the same consultant worked with in his prior district so he knew EXACTLY how to present this to her, too.
So it went well even though I assume principal will slide as she always has. However it is one more mark we have managed to get on her record. In principal superintendent agrees that DD's needs aren't going to be met in district. She understands that we have found an OOD placement we think will work but are open to considering others if they propose them. If it doesn't work amicably we will bring in the attorney. She knows this attorney and he has been very successful against our district. Basically she has our consultant, at our cost, working out a mediated settlement. Now we just wait and see what happens.