Did they tell you what piece was missing to be considered either ADD, ADHD or ASD? Both paeds we have seen tend to consider all of those disorders either symptoms of or commonly co-morbid with some sort of umbrella condition like ASD, ADD or ADHD, particularly once you start seeing a whole cluster of them not just one.
I had this thought too-- again, not doubting you, ABQ, you are a very perceptive parent. But your DS does read as being very like mine, who has the ASD diagnosis. There's enough of a dash of autism in there that I'm really surprised your DS didn't get at least a PDD-NOS dx. But yes, practitioners do differ tremendously in how they make ASD diagnoses.
DeeDee
