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Thank you for articulating this so well. THIS is where my DD is so phenomenally unlike anyone else I have ever met. She is amazingly empathetic and has been since before she could talk. She has an innate understanding of human nature that humbles me on a daily basis. She can zero in on underlying reasons for inexcusable behaviour and bring the person to talk about what is really bothering them. I often find myself unable to describe her with words. She has the most beautiful, knowing soul and people are drawn to her. She can talk about her feelings in ways that most adults cannot. If this could be considered a level of giftedness, then she is PG+. Funny how we are most likely to think of GT on only an academic level. Thanks for pointing out this aspect.

I, too, am not meaning to imply a belief in reincarnation, but I do refer to dd12 as an "old soul." She's always seemed older than she is and is usually mistaken for older than she is although she's a petite built person. I've had more people than I can say talk with her on the phone and tell me she sounds like a 25 y/o.

Her unusually long lasting focus on a specific field (marine mammology) also tends to make her sound rather expert since she knows a ton about it and other areas she's loved for a long time.

I would definitely agree with that. I share both your issues, my DH is 6'7", so 6' seems "quite short" to me and I have deeply offended people by saying that outloud at times. And amongst the children of a whole bunch of like minded professional types our kids don't stand out THAT much. In fact the ways in which they stand out most is probably sleeping less, being more intense, hard to keep up with in general, than overt "smarts".

and I do think this comes into it for our kids too:


It's not intentional but I think that comparatively to some families we have radically under supported any academic pursuits in our children while they are small. They get endless support to play and interact but not much to read, write, etc. Just thinking about my 14 month old, she requires constant attention and stimulation. Since she was only a few weeks old she has been utterly miserable if not kept constantly busy. But as avid a reader as I am, and as much as my older children love books, it has never occurred to me to read to her until last week. If she needs stimulation I take her for an outing, put her on the swing, build blocks, do puzzles, stacking cups, shape sorting, etc. We are a reading household, but due to a particular set of circumstances reading to her just hasn't been part of how I've parented her - so she's pretty damn unlikely to start reading any time soon!

Then again she's shape sorted younger than her siblings and she's quite interested in books now that we are reading to her.

Edited to add: I have wandering around for hours pondering this and finally had a "Duh!" moment. We didn't start reading to her young because she screamed pretty much non stop for the first 4 months and I just don't think to read to someone who is screaming at me... After that things were still pretty precarious for the rest of the first year.