Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Lack of independent play...

I agree that the frequency is starting to taper off, at least a bit. And deviation from the script is generally acceptable, as long as we're going in the general direction she wants.

I wouldn't be surprised if she gave it up by 8, but I also wouldn't be surprised if I still talked for her animals from time to time at 10.

On the planet I come from (autism world) a lack of independent play is treated as if it were a skill deficit. If the child won't play by himself (mine sure didn't) you teach him to, by rote, first a few minutes, then gradually adding time. Legos, K'nex, all that sort of thing was taught and his participation rewarded as if it were an unpleasant task to play. Which it kind of was, for him, until he got better at it.

At 8, he's still not fabulous at managing unstructured time, but he's better at it than he used to be.

I am fascinated that your non-autistic children do this-- I really thought it was just our neurological issue. I wonder how common this is among gifted kids.

DeeDee

DD7 is entirely *capable* of independent play. At school, she'll often choose to play alone for at least some of recess, even when other kids want to play with her. I suspect they're less willing to follow the script than I am.

Ds won't play by himself either. He does go to school though and was put into a play based school so he gets to play a lot with peers at school. He will work and play independently at school by himself. It seems he just likes to be around people. It's comforting to him. We used to live in nyc and had a pretty small apartment and their were basically no rooms so he was used to always being with someone. Now we have more rooms and I think it makes him feel lonely when he's by himself even when it is just a room away.

My DD now 9 rarely played. If I could get her to pick up a doll or a LPS she never would actually play out any scenarios etc. She would occasionally (usually when she got punished and sent to her room) create elaborate set-ups with them. Once she started she could go for hours building a new hotel or school or gym out of recycled materials.
As she has gotten older things have become easier but she is still a little velcro child that likes me,her brother or dad to do everything with her.
So opposite from my DS11 who began independent play at around 2.5!