Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion bored and gifted?

Below is a partial copy from Hoagies. (Thank you Dandy)

I'm wondering if anyone has advice to this point. I have trouble know if my DS is just complaining because it is not interesting enough or if the learning just lacks the depth or challenge. He is very ambitious in his school work and very self motivated. I also see him as someone who can tolerate some boredom but has his limits.


Hoagies article:
I think there's a basic problem here that we as the parents of gifted children must come to terms with. Not all useful learning is intrinsically interesting. Our kids have a right not to be bored in that they should not be held down, but they do not have a right not to be bored such that they have a right to skip anything that isn't fun to learn. Math facts are boring. Absolutely. But that doesn't mean that our precious children who don't tolerate boredom well shouldn't have to learn them. We have to teach our kids the difference between being bored because you are being taught something you have already mastered and being bored because the work is intrinsically boring but still important. We can turn our fertile brains towards making the practice fun and interesting, if we don't tolerate boredom well, but we don't get to just declare ourselves to be so brilliant that no one should ever make us do anything we don't feel like doing.

Love this! Absolutely our dilemma, and it's very hard to tell the difference! I relaly like the last sentence! I'm going to share this with ds.

We have this problem too. And I don't know what parts my DS is bored with because he knows and what he's bored with because the subject is "boring".

This is brilliant. I need to print it out and put it on the fridge. I think both DS7 and I could gain a lot by reading it every day

Could **I** declare myself so brilliant that no one should ever make me do anything I don't feel like doing? Like mopping the floor or cleaning the bathroom, which are the jobs I should be doing right now instead of procrastinating here?



Back to serious...

I would say that there are a variety of ways to learn math facts. Straight memorization is more than "not fun" for some kids--it's an ineffective strategy. Recognizing that gifted kids aren't all gifted at memorization (especially memorizing things they don't care about) is important, I think. They still have to learn the facts, certainly, but they may need "tricks" to do so or a context for why the memorization matters even more than other kids. It is not uncommon for gifted kids not to *really* learn their times tables until faced with algebra. I'm not saying that's a good thing, but it is something to be aware of.

I also think there's a "sweet spot" for learning math facts that is unrelated to a child's ability to understand the concepts involved. In that "sweet spot," learning the facts just comes more easily. They're ready for it.

I think that keeping a child from learning the concept because s/he hasn't memorized the facts isn't generally a good strategy. In our case, DS8 was doing multiplication when he was 6. He's nailing down the tail end of the times tables now, and his memory for them is MILES better now than it was when he was 6. I suspect there's a very good reason schools tend to expect kids to have those times tables down in 3rd grade. It just comes so much more easily. But keeping him from multiplication until he was 8 would have been a huge mistake!

It's a tough balance to strike (and I'm speaking from personal experience there!). But I always get wary of cracking down too hard on things like math facts. Math is more than times tables, more than arithmetic, even. Too often facts are used as an excuse for holding the kids down, as the article mentions, and kids wind up hating math. Alternatively, the kids who are good at memorizing the facts get the erroneous notion that they're good at math, when what they're really good at has very little to do with mathematics.

There must be balance.

IMHO...

Here's a great list I found some time ago.

"It's Boring" can mean:
- It's too easy.
- I'm confused, but I don't know how to ask for help.
- I don't like to (read, write, perform, etc).
- It's too difficult. I don't know where to begin.
- I'm not interested in this (content, course, etc).
- Everyone says this, and I want to fit in.
- It's not deep, complex, broad enough to tap my interest.
- I get A's without even trying. What's the point?
- I'd rather do _____________ .
- Just how many times do I have to show I know this work before you believe me?
- Something in my personal life is more important right now.
- I don't like the teacher because�
- I read the book already. What else can I read?
- I don't want to talk about this.

Great article. This is a real issue around here as well. Boring things and waiting for anything (which is of course, "boring")

We just watched Golden Hands with Cuba Gooding Jr. about Dr. Carson who is now the head of pediatric neurosurgery at JH hospital. Great movie to watch with the kids because it shows him struggling as a young student and doing very poorly. He goes on to work hard at his mother's urging and eventually attends Yale etc. It led to a great discussion about the difference between people who achieve things like degrees and interesting careers and those who don't is not nec. intelligence but effort and persistance. My kids really were impressed.

So timely this discussion. "It's so boring!", those words make my shoulders rise. My favorite right now is 'why do we have to sing songs about science? It's a complete waste of time!" or "why are we doing experiments about things we already know the answer to?" Ummmmm. We've also had the 'this is boring' about writing and it was because it was really tough for him. I love the list because it's not always the same reason that I'm hearing it. It's kind of like when he was a baby and he cried and you had to figure out hungry, wet, tired etc. Totally agree on the effort and persistance. Sometimes, boring work is important.

Thank you for this. This is exactly what we need. For my DS9 & DD6 they need to be able to put their situation into words.

I try to tell my kids what they are getting out of school, even if it does not seem like enough for them. Ex. This year is about learning to self manage a lot more work and getting it done in a timely manor. Also, learning to slow down so that you don't leave answers blank or miss half of the directions. Doing these things leads teachers to believe you might be mature enough for more opportunities. I think some of these things are not obvious to the student and parent. I try not to lead them down a path of school is not good, even though I wish it were a more appropriate challenge. I try to empathize but also make the best of the current situation.

When DS9 was in K he was in a montessori similar situation. This was also 8 to 1 teacher. The communication was open between the teacher and student. He was asked and allowed to say if work was too easy or too hard. He would then get harder work sometimes. That felt good to be proud of his work. It's so hard to deal with our current school where they don't know if they are teaching what he already knows. This is 28 to 1 teacher and assistant.