Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums GT Research Asynchronous Development

I really didn't understand what it meant when some of you referred to your kids as asynchronous so I decided to look it up. I came across this reference and was wondering how true it is?

http://giftedkids.about.com/od/glossary/g/asynchronous.htm

When it comes to intellectual, physical and emotional development did you notice a significant delay in the physical and emotional side as they suggested in the article? Im just curious how accurate this idea is that the higher the IQ the more out of sync the other developments are.

Well sure, although I would caution you that emotional maturity is not something that one can measure. Lots of things that look immature to others are actually excellent adaptaions to a difficult learning situation, or some other problem that MG or ND kids wouldn't have to face. Many will say that emotional maturity tends to be advanced in gifted children, but perhaps not as advanced as the intellectual stuff.

Organizational skills can be a typical area where some gifted boys are 'behind.'

Grin

DD never had a problem with emotional maturity. She was and still is far more mature than her actual age. Physically she started walking early (9.5mos) but was very clumsy and uncoordinated for a long time. She also was delayed somewhat in her fine motor skills but that may have had more to do with boredom than anything else. She wouldn't color until she was 5 (hated it), her penmanship was very poor up until this year, and she was never good with scissors. I will say that her intellectual development was considerably more advanced in comparison to her physical development but the emotional development was never delayed.

Oh yes, DD is a good example of AD (not ADD).

For example, she understands that everybody will die, including herself.
She knows that Santa is not real.

She has just started to make real drawings, not just the typical 'scrambles'.
She gets a tamtrum if DS (16 months) tries to get her Lego construction.

Socially speaking, I am not certain if she is either socially inmature or a social genius because she really has learn to 'act' or mimic other kid's behaviors.

Hi ladies.

My son walked independently at 9.75 months and climbed stairs and ran by 11 months, so I would not characterize him as physically delayed by any measure. Although his writing and math problems are really large and a bit messy also.

His asynchronous development, which was most obvious from age five to nine, presented because he was so intellectually advanced as compared to age and held mature social expectations that his classmates did not meet. Additionally, he is very emotionally intense. His feelings were easily hurt before he accepted common boy world behaviors and he didn�t hide it. With age, he is more willing to participate in boy world teasing and has become more a part of the group although he would only categorize one or two school buddies as good friends.

This article illustrates best what I mean when I refer to the fact that DS was very asynchronous as a young boy.

http://www.davidsongifted.org/db/Articles_id_10172.aspx

Did I ever tell you about the time DS got in big trouble for being upset, and causing a fuss, because the other little 5 year old boys in aftercare wanted to play "snake" with a plugged in electric cord, and the teacher thought that my DS was acting really, really immature for not just letting them be. She figured that he was probably feeling a bit left out for not being included in the game.

And I wonder why he's such a cynic at age 11. ((shiver))

Frowity, not Grinity right this minute

This is exactly the sort of situation I always think of when I think of asynchronous development. The world-at-large sees most clearly the kids who are emotionally intense, which means the child seems to be (or perhaps even is) behind age level in the emotional front.

But I think the more common issue is that an HG+ child seems like such a little adult intellectually, but then s/he gets hungry or tired and throws an age-appropriate tantrum, and the adults around can't understand what happened to the little adult. The contrast is so glaring that the tantrum seems much less age-appropriate than it is.

Child #1 in our family--the HG+ one--tends to be emotionally advanced, well-behaved, rule-oriented, and highly logical. At maybe 8 months old, he was figuring out EXACTLY what the house rules were by testing the boundaries and looking to me for a "no" so he could understand precisely what it was that I was saying "no" to. Can I roll the car on the wall with my right hand? How about my left hand? Can I bang the car on the wall? How about rolling it on the floor? When he got a nod and "yes" from me instead of a "no," he never did the "no" things again. I could almost see the wheels turning! It was one of the moments that told me for sure he was a GT kid.

Now, Child #2 is a drama queen, an emotional mirror and every other emotional intensity you could dream up. At age 3, however, he's pretty much right on target for his age, I think.

Interesting conversation!

This is absolutely true! I have found that adults that know dd7 expect so much more out of her and when she acts 7 they look at her cross-eyed.

We get the same looks when my 5 year old actually acts 5 on those rare occasion usually involving fighting with his 3 year old sister.

We're all so asynchronous at my house that I often forget gifted people can be otherwise. My kids are PG with AS, PG with ADD, PG with ADHD, and probably PG probably ADHD again. We have lots of sensory issues as well, which tends to compound the situation.

Sensory overload at a crowded birthday party used to make my oldest melt down, and the fact that he was socially a few years behind the other kids already just made it that much more difficult. Expectations for gifted kids tend to be that they behave as a child of their mental ability, but that doesn't work out with an aspie kid. So he'd be eight acting five, and then the sensory stuff would pull his behavior down to age three. Never mind that he was able to read and do intellectual tasks many years ahead...