Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Should I mention his age?

I was making an appointment for a conference with my son's 3rd grade teacher when she made a reference to the students being 8 or 9 years old. My son was with me at the time and he said, "I'm not 8 or 9." She looked at him and said, "Seven?" He didn't say anything more, but I realized that she doesn't know that he is still six. His birthday is at the end of November.

So I am thinking that it is a good thing that she didn't realize that he is younger... but I'm wondering if I should let her know that he's been accelerated or not? His handwriting is not really up to par, and I don't want her to think he's just messy...his writing is age-appropriate.

Any thoughts?

this is a really tough question...my thought is that his handwritting is probably age appropriate for a 7 so there isnt much to be gained....she can always look it up or ask DS if she gets curious. Very hard to know whats best here....maybe ask DS for his perspective? grinity

Well, I did ask him that afternoon. He said that he's already told several of his classmates and "they were all really impressed. It wasn't a bad thing, or anything." I guess it just hasn't come up with the teacher, although he had the opportunity to out himself and didn't...

exactly my point...

Personally, I'd let it be until it becomes an issue.

Ok, I'll keep my mouth shut. But if she asks me, I'm not going to lie. And I don't want DS to feel like he has to keep it a secret.

Thanks, everyone! It's good to hear from the voices of experience. I was thinking that something stopped me from mentioning his age to her right then and there. I should listen to that instinct.

I always flounder when these things come up. I usually say something related but not explicitly answering the question, like, "He's in Mrs. X's class." Sometimes people are persistent though, and I just tell them because I'm not good at lying.

If we end up accelerating DS7, everybody will already know how old he is anyway because it's a small school and a small town and we just don't know how to keep our mouths shut.

He would undoubtedly tell them he was x years, x months, and x days old anyway!

interesting getting a preview...

Now that DS5 is "officially" in school we get the question more often now about what grade he is in.

seems like folks hesitate because he is on the taller side and is pretty articulate. "1st... Kindegartedn...?" they ask.

Well he is in kindergarten, and this is a bummer for me and DS because he often answers, "I'm just in kindergarten" A lot of his good buddies are in 1st and I think he would like to be in 1st for that reason.

We haven't tested yet but I am guessing he is MG and not globally advanced enough to be accelerated. I was planning to wait for the spring to test, but maybe I will do it sooner...

in situations where we are not asked directly I let folks assume he is older...