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Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 7,207
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Joined: Dec 2005
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I agree with everyone else about not tiptoeing around this - no way would I avoid books or pages about this! Your DS might find Mummy Laid An Egg too babyish, but if not, I recommend it. Actually this is one of the many areas where David Attenborough Life series DVDs have been very helpful - having DS know about how sexual reproduction evolved and e.g. about how scorpions do it is useful background for talking about humans. Life on Earth and Trials of Life are both very good for this (and lots else). Ok, this was my approach, and we started with DS around age 3, hanging around on the toilet seat waiting for the poop to come out. The waiting around and then pushing really hard always put me in mind of his birth, so the topic of conversation came up - alot! I was sure to explain that it wasn't the same tube, but DS at 3 was well versed in how most body systems were basically fancy tubes, and could recite the journey of food. We also used to roll up Daddy socks and then unroll them to make a 'baby' pop out. Anyway, I've now softened my stance as DS was a great 'informer' of agemates. When ever school folks would inquire wasn't I afraid that older classmates might tell DS something he didn't know, I could honestly answer that that might make a refreshing change of pace from sitting at home fearing the angry calls from agemates' parents. DS13 is currently a freshman in High School, and knows all the 'hows' and 'whats', although my guess is that he doesn't have much firsthand understanding of the 'whys.' This seems like an advantage to me - who wants to go through mass hysteria, when one could have own individual hysteria? ((shrugs)) Grinity
Coaching available, at SchoolSuccessSolutions.com
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Joined: Dec 2005
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Also the intro to 'look who's talking' was very cute!
Coaching available, at SchoolSuccessSolutions.com
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Joined: Jun 2009
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Really great suggestions, everyone. Thanks!! Plus, these stories have me in stitches. I had to read them to DH last night because I was laughing so hard. DS does spend a lot of time studying anatomy sketches so he is already familiar with the names of all of their parts and their functions. Now I just have to make it clear about when it is appropriate to talk about these things. He asks me about my eggs with some regularity now.  Knowing more about the details is only going to make him talk about it more. He's one of those kids who is always thinking out loud so appropriateness is often challenging. Now it's time for my own little embarrassing story: This is part of what prompted this discussion. Two(ish) weeks ago, I was sitting in a crowded, but quiet waiting room with both DC. Out of nowhere, DS suddenly exclaims (in a fairly loud voice), "Oh, I thought the mom of the octuplets had WAY more than one uterus!" You can only imagine the stares I received after that!  Don't know where that thought came from or why . . . Hmmmm??
Mom to DYS-DS6 & DS3
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Joined: Feb 2009
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LOL @ that story sittin pretty!!! DS5.5 has never really asked how. He knows formal names for anatomy, but chooses to use words like "privates" instead. He knows that he and his sister were in my belly, but he also knows that they came out through my belly (c-sections). We discuss how animals attract each other - he especially likes the really weird ones - and I tell him that is how the male tells the female he likes her, etc... but he never really asks about the baby making/birthing process itself. I have a degree in health education and was very fortunate to take a sex education class in college that tailored teaching sex ed to different age groups. I actually have a book (if I can find it in the madness called my attic) that has worksheets and lesson plans to guide me when he does ask - not that we need to have a lesson, but it is nice if *I* have any questions! 
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 313
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My son caught me off guard with some of this when he was 3. While we were exiting the zoo, he noticed that there were a lot of couples there who didn't have kids. At this point, he still thought of couples in terms of the "mom" and the "dad" and didn't know what to make of a "mom and dad" with no kids. He told me he thought all "moms" had kids. When I told him no, not all people want to have children, he asked something along the lines of "don't their bodies make babies anyway?" Not knowing what else to say, I told him that if women don't want to have kids they can take a pill and it stops their body from making them. Within seconds, he got a huge smile on his face, stopped in his tracks and said (a little too loudly for comfort), "Now I know why you take a pill every day! You don't want to have any more kids!" Looking over my shoulder for anyone who might have been within earshot, I quickly ushered him to the car, feeling like I'd been outsmarted by a three year old.
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Joined: Jul 2009
Posts: 146
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I also agree just to treat it as any other anatomy/physiology question.
At the same time I'm happy nobody understands what DD2 is talking with us when we are out in public. She has not asked yet those questions but she is very interested about different genders. She knows there are boys, girls, men and women and so sometimes at the playground she might comment "Mommy, boy is coming, he has a penis, he is a boy" or even worse she sometimes thinks some more manly looking women are men and tells me "He is a men and has a penis like daddy, I'm a girl like mommy and I have vagina" You can only imagine how embarrassed we would be if that WOMAN would understand that our little girl thinks she is a man with penis .
She is also really interested how you eat food, where it goes from your mouth and how poop comes out. She is constantly wondering (and commenting) what happens to ppl's food.
Like I said, these are the times we are thankful she is bilingual!
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Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 6,145
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Be reassured that ALL kids go through that sort of "boys have pen1ses" phase. More than once I've heard it at the playground and I have reassured an embarrassed mom that it's normal and doesn't bother me at all. Personally, I think it's probably easier if they go through it younger rather than older, since it's easier to laugh it off when they're 2 or 3 or 4 than it is when they're in school. Oh, and LOL to all the stories! Love the pill one, MsFriz! 
Kriston
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Joined: Feb 2009
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My MIL tried "correcting" DS when he was about 3 when he told her that he, his daddy, and his papa had penises. She was even more "horrified" when I explained to her that we are teaching the kids the proper terms. And they cannot get in trouble for stating the correct terms... only if they use those terms in the wrong sense (like calling someone a penis - ha). This is the same woman who won't even say "poop" or "bowel movement", but says BM instead (I can understand in public, but she does it at home). Thankfully DH is on board with using proper anatomical terms, and I think that his mom is slightly less embarrassed these days!
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Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 748
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Some people don't let their kids use the appropriate words, but in our house the slang is banned! I'm constantly reminding DS "You do not have a wiener- those are hot dogs, you have a pen1s."
It's odd that at 6, he's never asked. Not once, not even when my SIL who lives 4 blocks away was pregnant. He just knows babies have a special hole to come out and they aren't "pooped" out. Never once asked how they got in there and I've never offered.
Recently he saw two hamsters "fighting" at the pet store. I suppose I could have corrected him at that point but I think I'll wait until he's asking for more info. It's possible he's already got it all worked out in his head and some day I'll get the "DUH mom, I knew that when I was THREE!"
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