Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion potty training issues

LOL re: scooping the garden. Reminds me of when I was training the boys indoors - you'd have thought we lived among deer.

As for the preschool, good luck to them. My ds(35 months)'s montessori toddler program has a small toilet in the room and I don't know if they've ever succeeded at getting him to sit on it. (Then again, they can't seem to get him to agree to participate in circle time either LOL - he stands off to the side.) Oh joy, can't wait to start PT-ing him at the end of the month

Hi Over42,

This was our son. At 3, he articulately told me in now way he would be trained. The next day, I took his diaper off as soon as he woke up and I stood in front of his door, not letting him out until he peed in the little potty chair in his room. It was a battle of the wills. He refused and proceeded to walk in circles, trying to hold it in. Finally, he ran over to the chair and did it. That's how he was finally trained. I believe gifted kids do not like change and their wills are stronger than normal kids. He's 27 now and getting a Ph.d in Lit. Difficult to raise but he's a joy to be with, now. I feel your frustration, having lived it. --San

over42, have you tried going straight to the toilet (rather than a potty)? Both my DS's went straight to the toilet and we had no problems - I'm not sure if it was the novelty of using what Mom and Dad use! With my younger DS's first attempt he wasn't ready and it became a battle of wills and I found myself getting annoyed. I simply stopped any attempts (including all talk about the toilet) for three weeks and then tried again with less pressure - it worked perfectly second time. Good luck

Well, I read the book and started fresh this morning..HA,HA,HA! She runs around holding it, crossing her legs, when she sits on the potty for 15 minutes...nothing. Get up for 5 min. pees all over the place and runs in shame crying and saying, "Don't yell NO at me Mommy" Holy crap, she peed one time in the potty and it took EVERYTHING to get her to. Then, she cares less for the treats and all and goes right back to holding it. I've screamed that this is it, because up until now I have totally let her do it in her own way. She can use the big toilet, (all set up), or her potty seat. I truly believe it is a battle of the wills. I do not know why she will not do this. She says she doesn't want to be a baby and wants to be a big girl...wow, all she has really learned today is how to clean up the messes and flush down her poop. She COMPLETELY has control and can dress herself, she even repeats all the training to other people. She is TRULY impossible, she has made a game out of changing her underwear and cleaning up the urine!!! Then tells me I have to sit on the toilet and yadda yadda. Meanwhile, No tv, no movies, no computer, no games, no toys..only books and coloring...plus, no treat foods unless she potties or at least tries too. We both are wore out. I truly believe if I back down now she will not use the potty until her 9 month old sister is trained!!! I cannot wait that long. HELP!!! Nothing, absolutely nothing has worked...but I will not give up. Sooner or later she will get tired of doing this day and night.

We talked DS5 up to it. Set a date, did the whole running around naked thing, and it worked in less than a day. But he was ready at 18 months, and he was already 2 when WE were ready. Don't threaten her. But don't give in to the diapers either, once you make a decision that it's time.

I know someone who had a son who wasn't trained until he was 5... and he's a senior in high school this year, and he does not still wear diapers.

Oh, and don't clean her right away (give her a few minutes being "dirty"). Tell her there are no more diapers, and you don't have time right at that very moment to clean her up and remind her that if she went IN the potty, she would be playing now.

by the way, some kids are totally freaked out about toilet bowls or by stuff leaving their bodies and being flushed away.

I have no idea if this will help but I will add what we did. DS did not potty train till 3.5yo & flat out told me he did not want to, that we could just keep changing him. We started & failed at PTing four times before it stuck. What worked: I made a potty chart & he got a star on it for every time he when potty. If he went all day with no accidents he got a sticker. For ever star on his chart he also got 15 min of computer time. This added up to a fair amount of computer time through the day but it was something he truly loved. We had an old egg timer to enforce the computer time. There was also a strongly enforced rule at our house that you only flush your own. DS liked to watch the toilet flush & it became a bit of a reward this way. As I recall in about 2 weeks we were done. He trained straight onto the toilet with just a small wooden stool.

I wish you the best of luck with your DD. You will both get through this. My only suggestion is to maybe work on getting her to relax on the potty. IF she is stressed out or over thinking it , it may not happen. Hopefully you will be done with all of this before too much longer.

Sometimes playing with warm water helps children relax so they can go. Try filling a bowl with warm water and a plastic toy to splash around with while she's sitting on the potty.
Good luck with day two!

I feel your pain. We are right in the middle of potty training and not that I really wanted to start up on this task during this week since we are leaving for a trip on Monday but she flat out asked to be potty trained instead of simply talking about it. DD is excited for about the first 3 hours and than is bored with the whole thing. And I too am having the issue of making her go on the pot with no luck and than 5 minutes later she pees in her pants.

What I have noticed is IF I can get her mind off the task at hand while she is sitting on the pot by playing silly games such as toss the underwear back and forth than she is able to pee in her potty chair with no problems.

And PurpleHeather ... the computer allowance is a great tip that I might have to try with DD since she loves the computer. But all of this will have to wait until we are back from our trip. I really can not imagine how I could potty train her while on the road. I really hope you have your DD trained here soon. Crossing my fingers for you.

For those who have boys, one trick is putting a toy duck or something in the potty and telling them it's target practice. "Sink the duck?" Fun game?