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That is a great to hear, might have to check that out too - here is an article on hg kids and relationships.

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It says this in the IAS? I might buy it more if it said, "Highly intelligent children commonly don't develop deep friendships". As in, the lack of deep friendships shouldn't be used to determine whether acceleration should not be done due to "social and emotional" reasons.

Uh, yeah, right.

Maybe because the kids are not in with their true peers.

That makes lots of sense to me. That is completely how my DS4 is. He loves people, all different ages. It seems when we go on playdates the other children are a little more excited about him that he is about them. He is a very likeable kid...but has certain friends he acts certain ways with. Some he just runs around with and acts goofy, some he plays board games with, some he builds things with, etc. He is pretty open to new people and new things...but he doesn't get attached. he would never say to me "when is so and so going to come over again" He doesn't miss people and doesn't talk about them much when they aren't around. Although he always knows the names of everyone and little details or facts/stereotypes about them...like "Lily likes princesses, that is all she ever wants to play with or talk about" or things like that. He doesn't seem interested in the whole "best friend" thing.

Although not like him...I too am a very social introvert, and DH is my true best friend. I have some close friends, and friends that I considered "best friends" growing up...but don't really need to be around them much to survive, LOL. And I get along with pretty much everyone and mingle among all different groups. I have always been like that. And I don't think it's a bad thing at all. I don't feel that I missed out.

Austin, you might enjoy the article I posted - it gets into some detail about proactive things that adults can do for kids in these situations, different developmental stages of relationships, etc.
Kind of spells out the 'why this happens' part in ways I hadn't thought of (kids who don't easily connect, not much about kids who do easily connect, which I know is what started this thread! )

The author breaks the kids into three groups. Its starts to get at why kids need a different set of services.

"The highly gifted child having peer difficulties because he or she is advanced over age peers in expectations for reciprocity and mutuality, in moral development and in specific needs for close intimate friends, needs contact with older gifted peers at similar levels of social development no matter what his or her age. Even in preschool years many highly gifted children are ready for best friends and yearn for that closeness and intimacy. These children cannot be happy in a typical preschool class where friendships change daily based on activity needs."

Regarding what Austin highlighted above, my DS4 has recently developed such a close, intimate friendship with a boy at his preschool/daycare that it's making me feel bad for enrolling him in kindergarten early. He'll start kindy next fall, while his friend will stay in preschool. I never imagined I'd have to worry about friends he'd be leaving behind at this age, but these two 4 year old boys make me think of 9 year old girls, the way they giggle at their own inside jokes and seem to be in their own little world whenever they're together. My son is already dreaming about sleep overs, and he's just barely 4. I've wondered if giftedness could explain this, but I have no reason to believe that his friend is gifted.

Even if your ds doesn't have any issues making new friends in the new school, I would make an effort to keep these two guys in contact - it sounds really nice!

This describes me & DS5 to a tee. He does have a boy he calls his best buddy, but he doesn't always play with him at school, etc... and he RARELY asks if he can come over or vice versa. He'd rather go to places like the zoo or museum or library. I have many, many, many friends, and most, especially while growing up, weren't necessarily part of the social network as the others (like stated, the chess friends, the lunch friend, etc).

That's it Dottie, verbatim. There's a whole section above it about parent's groundless fears when it comes to loss of contact with age peers.