Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Help with my 4yr old... (long)

My oldest DD4 (she acctually isnt 4 till feb. 9th) is very very confusing to me she did everthing in babyhood very early rolled over 1mo., sat alone 3 1/2mo., crawled at 5mo., stood alone in middle of the room for more then a few min. at 6 1/2mo., walked at 8 1/2mo....at 6mo. she started her love of books (even paper books and has never torn a book) and would sit alone quietly for around an hour looking at books and babbling she had all the books memorized at 2 and would "read" them she also memorized all the names of all the pictures on her flash cards (two packs) i didnt teach her these they were lying around and she picked them up and asked what they were she knew them all (even weird ones like umpire ) within a few days of asking the names of them

she continued this way for a while she learned her abc's and counted to 18 around 2 1/2 (i didnt teach them to her she just walked in the room one day saying abc...or counting). Around 2-2 1/2 is when her verbal ability started she could talk to you like a 4-5yr old (funny thing is she only started talking at two years old) by the time she was three her vocabulary was almost equel to mine (she only knows the words she hears) and i have a decent vocab. she was using large words in perfect context and has continued on growing her vocab she is now on about an 7-8yr old (maybe higher) level in verbal ability (her vocabulary is like an adults) but still of course has the imaturity of a 4yr old

she also has an interesting imagination and is constantly taking things/toys and building/creating new things with them (she uses the metal bars from her broken babydoll highchair on her babydoll umbrella stroller so that she can attach the babydoll carseat) shes very inventive and creative and my husband often tells me she is odd or strange because the things she says or does i just tell him well thats just her she a little different she sometimes talks to people who arent there but doesnt have one certain imaginary friend

she asks a ton of questions and strange things (at age 3 in the car one day she asked where do the waves go?? we were no where near waves and she hasnt ever really even seen waves) i often do not know the answers and tell her we will ask her father or look online later..

i wanted to add she knows her letters but not all their sounds and refuses to say her numbers (she used to count but refuses now) but told me the other day that she knows how many there are (they were cheerios) but doesnt know the words for it i often feel she may know more in these areas then she lets on she is a perfectionist and tends to hide in these areas..

so my first question is even though she didnt talk at 7mo. or read at 2-3yrs and all those amazing things is she still gifted? or just a bright 4yr old?? (she acctually isnt 4 till feb. 9th)

im also wondering are there other kids on here who dont know much about letters and numbers and counting and reading but still seem very advanced in other areas???

Welcome!
I am definitely no expert, but all of what you write sounds very gt ***gt flags all over it, imo****.

Especially the more abstract stuff - the building things out of other things, asking about the waves - at age 3? That's sounds pretty serious to me.

We have a similar dd2.5, prone more to taking things apart than putting things together, massively verbal, I personally have no doubt she is at least moderately gifted.
Not reading at 4 is not a sign that a child is not gifted.

She sounds great, enjoy this fun time with her!



quick edit: really, picking up a picture and wanting to know the word that the picture represents is mighty abstract as well. I don't want to downplay that, and she doesn't sound like she's not into language - quite the opposite - but probably strong in several areas.

Hi, your DDs infant development sounds a lot like our DD4 in Oct. I bet the two girls would get along well. Would love to hear more about your DD. Welcome!

Sounds like possible GT to me. My HG+ ds6 wasn't combining words till past 2, with veery few combos until 27 months or so. He was reading by around 3, but the talking was borderline delayed.

No time for a long post, but gifted kids don't all read early and talk early! You de sounds like she's got some pretty deep thoughts going on. Welcome!

I have a 2yr old DS who i think may end up being the early math and reader type he started talking in 3-5 word sentences and showing intrest in letters at 1yr old he just turned two and can count out 10 objects (which is kinda funny because his 4yr old sister cant/wont count things) but anyways they are both very different kids with different strengths however they both seem strong verbally i really think my daughter is gifted in a different way shes more of a thinker/dreamer her memory is amazing and i see such potential i really think she could read and do math if she was even remotly interested in doing so but insted shes more worried about what vitamins (lol in my yogurt i was eating) look/taste like? or why it rains? or how the water got on the outside of the cup?(these were all asked at 3yrs old)

i just often doubt myself.. This gifted stuff is just so confusing to me unless they are reading at two or talking in sentence at 8mo. or whatever how are you supposed to know if they are really gifted? or just a bright kid..?

Wow! early talking for a boy. DD was our early talker. I also have a DS almost 2. He is a counter and is very observant. He knows all the letters and sounds. He talks but we do not know what he is saying all the time. I also am trying to figure out if they are GT. So I can relate to what you are going through. Have you checked out Hoagies gifted education page.

Welcome Faithhopelove.

Some children don't focus on the ABCs and numbers and the perfectionism could be the reason why. She could very well comprehend it but until she understands the next step might not be willing to share. Also a lot of gifted kids do not learn to read through phonics and learning the sounds of letters fall under phonics. She might just know the words by sight without sounding it out and through memorization builds her vocabulary.

The major flags in your post ties to cognitive process such as the rebuilding of broken objects into something else of function for her to play with as well as the wave question. These go beyond memorization and shows advanced development for her brain. So yes she sounds gifted and I am going to take a wild guess that one day she will just have it with the reading and soar like an eagle with her reading abilities such as she did for her verbals. (again the perfectionist gene!)

she deffinitly has some sight words she recognizes store names and mommy and daddy and her and her little brothers names among a few others that i know of she also can bring me a letter and say this is the first letter in Dog (and its a D in her hand)she just doesnt know the letter sounds(shes been doing this stuff for a year). I asked her how to read a word the other day and she said "you put the sounds of the letters together" so she knows how just has not memorized the letter sounds she doesnt seem interested either they are just sorta things she knows that dont seem to matter to her

another thing she does is recognizes logos i have a race for the cure shirt that has logos on it for different companys and she pointed at yoplait and said why is the yogurt sign on your shirt? then pointed at the ford logo and said isnt that a car?

also knows what all the movies are (out of the cases)she has done this for a year and a half though..

These kids sure don't seem to develop in a straight and steady line. Often the reading develops similar to the big leap in speaking that she did. You have to take into account that she has a 3 year old body, and her eyes, for example, may be developmentally normal for a late 3, which might be not ready for reading. I'm not saying that it is her eyes (although you might want to get her some paper mazes and see if she is interested)- just an example of 'Asynchronous Development.'

Smiles and Welcome,
Grinity

I was going to suggest that while I agree that early reading is not required for GTness--not even HG+ness--I'd definitely recommend keeping tabs on her vision.

It may be a different situation, but here's what I was seeing with DS4.5: very verbal, but not looking at books. Reading seeming stalled out, not just that he was focusing on other things. Sounding out spoken words and writing them on paper, but not reading them in books. Etc....

Something just didn't sit right with me. Though I have read a lot about GTness, still I alternated between thinking he was clearly GT and thinking that he wasn't GT at all. (This is apparently very common for parents of kids with 2E issues, including visual processing issues.)

At the suggestion of many friends here, I decided to take DS4 to a developmental optometrist. It was a good move. DS4 now has reading glasses and may eventually need vision therapy to help with his "immature" visual processing ability. His reading has improved markedly just in the past couple of months, so I'm hoping we might not need the therapy. But it's nice that it's available now if he does need it.

I'd recommend that you check out www.covd.org to see if there's a developmental optometrist near you, just to rule out vision issues. These are much more than just reading an eye chart--which is all that most pediatricians do with kids at this age.

Now, kids definitely develop at all different speeds, and I am a staunch advocate of not pushing kids if they're not ready to read. Please let me be clear about that! But I think that most highly verbal kids don't completely stall out on reading for 18mos-2+ years. It seemed weird to me. I think it's at least suspicious enough to merit a look-see. If there is a problem, then catching it sooner (at 4) rather than later (like in mid-elementary) can make a huge difference in how a child deals with the problem.

Not trying to worry you. Just another thought.