Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Age or Ability Specific Forums what about preschool?

One comment about Montessori, just to provide a counterpoint: some of us had less than stellar experiences at Montessori pre-Ks.

Montessori is a lovely theory, and when it is practiced appropriately, it can work wonderfully. But sometimes the practice can be a little too lockstep for HG+ kids. If a child must do activity A before he can proceed to activity B, it can shut him down. (It did my son.) Some GT kids need to start in the middle. If that's not okay with the teacher or the school, it's not good for the child.

My advice is to look CAREFULLY at the individual school and teachers. In my experience--and that of many other here according to previous conversations about this topic--the specifics of the school and teacher and how open they are to individual differences matter significantly more than what general philosophy the school embraces.

And be aware that the director of any school (Montessori or no!) can tell you whatever she wants about how individualized the school will be for your child. If the *teacher* doesn't "get" your child or isn't on board with providing different work--even at the pre-K level--all the promises in the world are meaningless. Flexibility and responsiveness to your child's needs and a willingness to take every child starting from where they are are most important in a pre-K.

IM(not so)HO...

We were lucky to have a mom with an older HG+ kid recommend a preschool teacher that her son loved. If you can find some families with HG kids and ask about any recommendations, that might be most helpful. Our DS4 is in his second year of preschool.

We felt that preschool was important because we were new in town, didn't have a big social circle yet, and really wanted DS to learn how to behave around and have respect for another adult while at the same time having a school-like experience around other kids. This is a part-time, play-based preschool (2 half days for 3-4 yo/3 days for 4-5 yo). We went to visit the spring before enrollment to get a feel for the room and saw a bunch of happy kids listening to the teacher (amazing!). I told the teacher ahead of time that DS could read, and that we weren't really interested in any academics but wanted DS to have an experience with other kids and a teacher. She "got" him right away.

We did have some problems, though. The first year, DS had never been away from mom with a stranger, and never had a babysitter except grandma. He did not want to leave mom. This took several months to shake, and then after the holidays he started some lengthy goodbye rituals. Now, a few months into the second year, we are getting longer and longer complaints of "i hate preschool," "don't sign me up again," "i'm not going to any school after preschool," and I have to drag him there every time. I am starting to think that was fabulous for 3 yo, new 4 yo is not so wonderful for 4 yo/almost 5 yo. But I can't quite figure out what the problem is, because he will only give me weird answers to why he doesn't like preschool ("it's in a church" or "the room's too small").

So, I guess i'm getting the first taste of "what might work for a little while for an HG+ kid may not work 6 months/year later."

Good luck making a decision! I'd vote for a play-based, part-time preschool though, for any kid.

Hmm... I agree with almost everything you said, st pauli girl, but not this. I think full-time preschool was better for my DS than part-time would have been, because it let him build serious long-term relationships with the other children and the staff. Also, the place he went to had very low staff turnover and was extremely well equipped with a great garden, which is harder for a place that takes children only very part-time to manage, though I'm sure there are exceptions. He was there full time from 10 months; it certainly didn't hold him back academically (or at least, if he'd have gone any faster without it, I don't know to know :-) and I credit it with his being far and away better at getting on with other children than either DH or I were at that age.

So my version is: I'd vote for a play-based preschool, for any child

You caught me making a generalization! Bad me; I try not to do that. You are right, of course.

Of course every child is different, and every family's personal and financial situations are different, and what is right for my family is not necessarily right for yours, and of course you have to make your own decision (think I got all the requisite disclaimers in there!). But I'm with OHGrandma on this one; I wouldn't trade one minute of the time I spent/am spending with the lads at that age for the best preschool programme in the world. And, what is more important, I'm really pretty sure that they wouldn't have wanted/don't want that trade, either.

They're not little for very long!

minnie

I dunno...some days it seems like I can't get them off to college and out of my bathroom fast enough!

There's a reason Mother Nature gave me boys! We get what we can handle...

Razor theft is a unique trait endemic to the female of the species. Theft is tolerated only because the undetected return of a woman-worn blade is a worse crime.

Oh...i thought you guys wouldn't notice.

I think 1 in 100 female leg hairs are made out of titanium. As a self-defense mechanism, that one little hair destroys the blade area that touches it. There may be a few dozen per leg.

Under a microscope, that area appears designed to hook the larger hairs on a man's face.

Experimentation by the author has shown the effect is like applying wax to one's face then ripping it off. The face looks like an aerated lawn. Men are not used to self-torture.

In response, men have started purchasing razors loaded with testosterone-colored features.

Women just turn out the lights and use the razor anyway.