Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion options for 15 year old after high school

My eldest skipped two grades. My youngest skipped one and was given a quasi-skip this year. All her work is a year up but she's still in the lower grade. Her school is wonderful that way. They also know that she's uncomfortable with the age gap.

My eldest is spending an extra year in a dual-enrollment program because of not being ready for college at 16. Both see advantages (academics) and disadvantages to the skips. There were some hard social times for my eldest. Bottom line: being so young makes you a bit of oddity among your classmates. My youngest dreaded the first day of school one year because everyone had to tell their birthdays. She remembered how people reacted the year before. The school is nice, though, and they stopped doing that when they became aware of the problem.

This advice may not be popular here, but I recommend against multiple grade skips apart from exceptions below. When kids are little, skips tend to be fine because little kids don't really notice. But when the class gets to 8th grade or so, a double-skipped student is a little kid with peers who are adolescents. This really is a big deal, regardless of how it's downplayed among the gifted advocacy groups. I've met too many people who were multiple grade skipped and talked about high school misery to believe that multiple skips are a good idea for many/most kids.

IMO, the dynamic on this forum and in other gifted groups focuses too much on the benefits of skips (academic) and too little on the very real social challenges that accompany them. I'm going to be honest and get myself into trouble and suggest that maybe this is due to parental emotional reaction to the skips. Sorry. Yes, you can undo a skip later, but this tends to happen after the child has gone through hard times induced by the skip.

Very intelligent kids stand out regardless. Multiple skips tend to magnify the difference, not hide it --- even in socially adept kids like mine. In a perfect education system, everyone would study subjects as they became ready, not in lockstep. But the vast majority of US schools don't run on that model. If you can find one that does, that's great. If not, it's a tough decision.

Our education system is lousy in many ways, and charting a least-worst way through it is important. This may involve acceleration. However, it's critical to consider the social implications and not pretend that they won't happen, regardless of other people saying, "But I/my child skipped 11 grades and it was grand." The reality is that every child is different, age-gap problems can happen, and they must be considered for the sake of your child. The kid is the one who has to live with it.


Exceptions:

* Dual enrollment programs, because high school classes are with kids close to age. For college, everyone chooses different classes and spreads out, so the age/ability gap is less obvious. I highly recommend these programs. Students get some exposure to the demands of college early and end up with college credits at no cost.

* A school willing to make accelerations that keep a student in-grade while doing above-grade work. Works best when other kids are in the same boat.

This old post has a roundup of discussion threads on acceleration (both PROs and CONs).

Because acceleration can lead to early college, there is also a roundup of discussions on early college.

Fortunately, there has been much research on this topic and the general consensus disagrees with your suggestion (I'm reminded that the plural of anecdote is not data).

Senior year in HS I was 16 when my girlfriend turned 19. Most others were 18. I had no issues and am quite glad I accelerated.

At the same time, I'm keeping my DYS DD in her grade for various reason. The IAS has some very good research-based diagnostics to help evaluate any specific situation. we were fortunate to be able to work with one of the authors.

Bottom line is that there's no "right answer", only one for each individual. But there is aggregated data from wide-ranging research.

@marigold82076
My DD16 (skipped 2nd and 6th grades) is mere days away from making her college decision for next year and will graduate HS later this month.

I can't speak to the transition to college, as that hasn't happened yet. But I can talk a little about our college search. FYI - of the 14 schools applied to (we cast a wide net, wider probably than needed, but we're worriers), all but one are private schools, and the majority of them would be considered small to medium sized.

The one public school (and our safety school as admission was guaranteed), the University of Iowa, has the Bucksbaum Early Entrance Academy - after inquiring (their descriptions all talk about leaving HS early and our DD will be completing 4 years of HS and fully graduating), they determined our daughter did meet their criteria for early entrance and offered her admission into their program. I bring this up as there are multiple early entrance options out there and other programs may also agree that early entrance can still allow for completing HS.

As to the private schools (13 total), no one came out and said age was an issue, and for the majority of them I doubt if age came into play. Certainly the 6 acceptances had no issue with her age. Perhaps the 5 rejections were due to age, but they were also schools that fell solidly into the reach bucket (DD's scores were fine, but for Ivy/near-Ivy even excellent kids are reaches). The final 3 were waitlists - one very much a reach and the other two are schools that routinely reject/WL kids with great stats as they hate being safeties for those kids, and those were two of the schools DD demonstrated the least interest in.

All-in-all, I don't feel age held her back in the application process, or at least it didn't seem to at the majority of schools she applied to. For one of her acceptances, I think age may have actually helped her. This is a small, highly selective school, who openly says they craft their classes to have a lot of diversity, and I think my DD's age helped make her a unique addition.

And, by the way, I wholeheartedly disagree with Val. My DD not only is doing fine twice skipped, but is thriving. Most of her HS teachers don't know she's been skipped and most of her classmates don't care.

Best of luck,
--S.F.

@SFrog - I didn't consider that he could possibly apply to Early Entrance programs as a HS graduate. That gives me something to think about.

All - Thank you for the feedback. Bottom line - No easy answers.

I've mentioned before that I come from a sibling group who all were radically accelerated and entered college early. I have no regrets about my own experience that might be attributed to radical acceleration. There were some awkward moments along the way, but I think for our family system, we had sufficient family and community supports. The challenges also were not made any harder by the grade skips; they may have been made less pronounced in some cases. This is not going to be the case for every student. Parents really do have to make these decisions on a case-by-case, year-to-year basis.

One of ours has skipped two grades so far, and is on track for early college entry in the near future. That one is highly social, mature, and self-aware, with grade-appropriate work and organizational skills, and was entirely accepted by grade-mates back before we started homeschooling that particular child. Another is putative 2e, struggles with production, and is introverted, which is why we have not chosen to make the same grade skip choices. Granted, we homeschool, so we have a lot of latitude for making and unmaking grade skips, and for fully individualizing instruction. In an institutional school, there would be additional layers in the decision-making process.

My DS has one full elementary grade skip and one year in middle school with most of his classes accelerated but retaining his grade level. It is possible to have him officially grade skip at the end of next year and possibly then even graduate only spending three actual years in high school. He once told me that the odd years of elementary school are useless and he should skip to an even grades only plan.

We don't plan on doing any more skips...if he runs out of classes and out grows it there are dual enrollment opportunities and possibly some other opportunities that I have run across.

With regard to options other than straight to part- or full-time college: one may explore a special non-academic interest (arts, athletics, languages, a technical skill, etc.), experience the world of work, spend some time mastering skills for independent living, engage in service projects or charitable work, travel (e.g., visit extended family members in various parts of the country/world)...

These are all excellent suggestions. Davidson offers a free guidebook: Considering your options: A Guidebook for Investigating Gap Year Opportunities

I have done a small amount of research on Gap Year programs, and most seem to be aimed at kids who are at least 17 yrs old. I fear employment opportunities would also be limited for a 15-16 yr old HS graduate.

DS is many years away from this point, but a second grade skip is imminent.

I would love to hear some stories of successful gap-years for younger graduates.