Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Differences between public and private schools

I think the author has a great point - the one I like most - which is - when someone is invested in their school, they usually are more focused on their education.

Public schools have to take everyone. And, right now, there seems to be too much emphasis on teaching to the test.

For some teachers, they may choose to take the lower salaries to be in a smaller classroom where they usually have more control over their curriculum and where the families are more involved in the school. And where they don't have to invest all their teaching energy on those very kids who don't care because their performance/job depends on that.

One thing I've observed is that the private school teachers seem more invested. In the public schools, teachers rarely come to the kid performances unless paid. At private school, all the teachers typically turn out for student events.

In public school, teachers seem weighed down and focused on bureaucracy (common core, school requirements, district policies). My son's teacher complains daily about state and federal policies to her 5th grade class. I don't see this focus and distraction in the private schools.

It seems that the private school DS attends has higher expectations from the teachers and the students. A lot of the teachers seem to have no credentials in teaching and go through the school's certification and training process. But they more than make up for that with the passion and energy that they put into their work. They seem to be able to take on more tasks on a day to day basis. Which include both teaching tasks as well as non-teaching tasks. The level of customer service we receive from the administration and the teachers themselves is far superior to what we encountered at the local PS. And there is a lot of focus and time spent on developing the student's character, preparing for contests (for those interested), teaching many soft skills and enrichment activities in addition to rigorous academics.

Our experiences with children at a particular private school in our town have been a complete turn-off. You couldn't pay me to send my children there. Obviously, this is one school, but the elitism, entitlement, and toxic attitudes are something to see. It is the most expensive private school in town.

I don't think either public or private is better, but it's good to have choices and options as a parent. In our case the application process was somewhat arduous, but in retrospect this weeded out a lot of folks (parents and kids) who were not 100% committed to the school and to making things work. It's not a casual thing.

The scale of private schools is also nice - everyone can know me, my spouse and my kid. This gets harder as schools get bigger and bigger.

I will speculate that there are marked differences between small, relatively inexpensive private schools (say, <$10,000 annual tuition), and larger, more expensive private schools (many prep schools, name schools with large, elaborate facilities). With the fancy buildings and grounds come a hefty cost in capital and upkeep, which requires them to recruit families from a segment of the population which is enriched for the elitism, entitlement, and toxic attitudes referenced by ultra. Sweeping generalization, of course.

Small, budget private schools, OTOH, are often eking along on fundraisers and multiple-hat-wearing staff and volunteers, which has the added benefit that faculty and staff tend to know the students from multiple perspectives. The schools also may be more likely to have some kind of common vision underlying their existence, whether it's religious or other-philosophical in origin. A school that prices itself lower is probably more concerned with access than exclusivity.

And, of course, all private schools select for families that have made conscious choices about their children's education, while public schools must take all comers, and cannot de-select challenging or labor-intensive students of any description

Hey! Even reactionaries have feelings .

What timing! I was at a kindergarten preview event for YDS this week, which was our first actual public school event. ODS (our identified PG kid) has been at three private schools so far. The last time I called the public school to explore possible attendance, it didn't seem that they were very flexible nor knowledgeable about higher levels of gifted.

I was sitting in the kindergarten event feeling like an odd duck, indeed. We are looking at it because it's close, free and YDS has decided he wants to go there (!). We also have not done well in meeting friends for the family or boys in our area, largely because we travel to take the boys where they are now and our closest neighbors don't have kids.

Was fully prepared to be turned off, and instead, I was surprised by the way they run things and believe it could be a good fit for him. He is our more easy-going child, also very smart but more likely to fit in because of his personality, if that makes sense. They talked about how they move each child along throughout the year from where they start, with the goal being academic growth. Even gave good examples. Lots of small group and individual work. (I was turned off a bit by the comment that they never have parents say they wish their kids had started earlier, rather than go through the transitional/pre-K, but am trying to be fair and think the parents who feel that way probably don't bother to say it. At any rate, he's going at 5, so does not apply. lol)

ODS was already so far advanced at 4 that public k wasn't even an option for him at that point. So I was also feeling sad and thinking about how much I wish he could be in a local environment with some of the public school amenities and friends nearby. But it doesn't work for him, unless we really want to have him wait a lot for others to catch up. I just feel like we are the weird family, no matter where we go.

I agree with Bostonian. That remark was a bit much.

I know families who struggle to pay the tuition at pricey private schools. Many of them have to make monthly payments (rather than being able to pay tuition in a lump sum), and they drive the same old cars for 15 or more years because they can't afford a car payment and a school payment.

Also, at least around here, the environment at prep schools tends to be far from "entitled" and more along the lines of "Get good grades so that you get into a top-tier college! "

I realize that we have a serious problem with wealth disparity in this country, and I've seen outrageous entitled attitudes up close. I've also seen outrageous attitudes among people whose incomes are all over the board. While the specifics of what drives each person's bad attitude are different, a lot of it derives from the same basic set of character flaws. So I don't think that painting prep school families with a broad brush helps.

Looking at this point through another lens, a lot of people (including many teachers and school administrators) see parents of gifted kids as self-entitled elitists who act as though their kids deserve more than what everyone else gets.

One aspect that hasn't been discussed is parental engagement. Because of the nature of compulsory public education, the public schools spend a lot of effort trying to promote parental engagement, because they're dealing with many children who are being neglected at home to varying degrees. In private schools, there's the opposite problem, because not only are wealthier families who select private education prone to tiger mom syndrome, but these parents feel a greater sense of entitlement as paying customers.

On an unrelated note, we have rejected our local privates, because they appear to support their reputations for academic excellence by loading down the children with unacceptably excessive amounts of homework.