Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion There's a reason why your kids aren't (selected)

I read this article on There's a Reason Why Your Kids Aren't Playing (http://www.boston.com/sports/blogs/obnoxiousbostonfan/2014/10/were_about_a_month_or.html#comments) and thought how much of it relates to the 99% that are not gifted with academics, art, music, and everything else - not just sports.

The article indirectly, and unintentionally, touches on the nature/nurture part of giftedness debate. Public schools seem willing and ready to accept the 1% of kids who are naturally gifted athletically with mainstream sports (football or soccer for instance, but not circus level acrobatics for instance) - but too often not for others.

Indeed, I'm often finding parallels between the experiences of gifted children in athletics, music, entertainment, and academics. You can find hothousing in all of them, excessive pressure, children self-destructing emotionally, etc. You can also find children who are obsessed, focused, and goal-oriented, who are dragging their parents along with them.

But, according to the article in that other thread, when my DD9 dragged DW and I to the soccer field last night to work on her goalkeeping skills, we were pushing her.

But it is real life. At school my child does his maths in a mixed ability group - this is supposed to be good for all.concerned. therefore sports at school level should have mixed ability teams and anyone who gets more than a year ahead should be hobbled.

yep that's why I don't think school sports should feed into representative sport. If you're kid is that good/motivated, join a club and go crazy with it. When they bring in top tier classes I'll support top tier sport in school.

Have to say though in general I agree with the article, I just think that school is sometimes the ONLY place certain children will experience sport. If a child is refused entry in to a gate program they still will have average academic training, even if parents are totally clueless a standard of education can be a achieved. With sport if kids don't participate at school and parents don't encourage it after school then there are swathes of children who just don't move - with the western obesity epidemic I would think schools are a great front line defence. Team sport should be offered because of all the benefits experts suggest and those benefits shouldn't be limited to the elite by demanding average kids play social or individual sport.

I don't love this article. The mindset he promotes may be okay for HS sports, but he seems to be promoting it for ALL youth sports at all ages. Come on now. I'm glad my son's sports coach is playing all the kids equally, including the stars, the kids who are not good, and the middle-of-the-roaders. I find it totally inspiring to watch some of the least competent kids make improvements. If you want to be on a super-competitive team in HS that goes to state, sure, don't expect to play every game, but that is not why I signed my child up to play rec league ball. He's doing it because it's fun and good exercise and good for him in lots of ways.


What a weird, myopic statement. I have never "fancied" this scenario, and I'm very sure my parents (every parent EVER?) never did either.

Of course, I find sports marginally important to my life. I do enjoy watching my son play ball more than watching him compete in chess, though. That's a snooze.

That's because school administrators, teachers, and the general public identify much more with mainstream sports.

Because they are *mainstream* by definition.

That's a very good point JonLaw and the point I try to keep making. They're part of the 99%.

Some of you might be interested in "the smartest kids in the world" by Amanda Ripley, stupid title, not the greatest of books, but interesting premise, trying to understand the differences in success generated by education systems around the world by comparing the experiences of American exchange students in countries that do well in surveys such as PISA and coming to the conclusion that one of the biggest problems about the US system is that the one thing most schools, kids and parents focus on over academics, spend more energy on, spend ridiculous hours and money on, and all round take more seriously than academics in all respects (including the idea that ability and results matter over self esteem) is sports.
I apologize if anyone feels I should not promote criticism of the educational system of a country not my own. I can easily turn that criticism round on my home country by replacing sports with "social and political aspects and agendas". Just wanted to throw this out there for anyone interested.

Tigerle - thanks. And since I'm married to a Brit who was also criticizes the educational system in the US, I applaud you for coming out and saying it too. Yes, Brits are into football (aka soccer) and people like David Beckham are incredibly talented and wealthy as a result from playing the sport. However, there isn't this insane asylum here where every child has to and needs to play sports.

Sports are completely and utterly overemphasized here in the US. It borders on idolatry, imo. Worse, when I was growing up, there was a presidential physical fitness test and no allowances or accommodations were made if you had low muscle tone (hypotonia), had motor planning or coordination issues, were shorter than average, or whatever - everyone had to take the test, if I remember correctly, and everyone was pegged according to the standards of this test. It was a dictatorship situation which few parents challenged or questioned.

It's really crazy. Parents think they can groom the next Tiger Woods or Andre Agassi and make a boatload of money from their kids. Not a good recipe for life, imo.

You'd definitely enjoy this book, then! I just edited my post realizing I hadn't mentioned that the author compared the experiences of exchange students around the world, among others a kid who went to South Korea and was amazed at how seriously the final examinations were taken there (insanity in their own way, neither I nor the author promotes the Korean system in any way).
One anecdote was about a Korean student moving back and forth between Korea and the US with her parents and being absolutely amazed that the one exam that compared even remotely in how rigorous it was and how seriously it was taken was the presidential fitness test!

I have a nephew currently on a student exchange in the US. He is amazed that he is expected to do three hours of football practice every single school night AND then do his homework afterwards at 7 pm. As an exchange student, he is having a special and rewarding time with it but as a European he is amazed why this is considered normal or desirable for anyone who is not expecting to compete in any way professionally as an adult.