Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Wow, great argument, not all children are gifted

Agreed.

My DD may have some unusual problems related to her asynchronous development, but there is little doubt that some of those "problems" are more about her relative rarity, and not really about "how much it sucks to be PG."


Which-- it doesn't. At least not until you crash into elements of the world that can't flex to meet you (at all).

Gifted children are still just children. They don't have much power and they are often treated unfairly.

Look again at the quote; she specifically cited how hard it is to be a gifted adult.

I'm grateful there are blogs out there like this, but.... I actually find them really depressing. As someone starting out on this journey all I keep seeing is doom and gloom, how my kid is destined to be a miserable out cast etc. I just can't believe it for her sake. I know she will have some social issues but I want to read positive stories about how people have got their kids to be successful and happy!

Just wanted to respond to Indigo's comments about mindset. I completely agree that many gifted individuals are underachievers, afraid to take risks, and have never learned to challenge themselves. Many never reach their potential because they have never learned HOW to push themselves. My concern with Gladwell is that his perspective has implied that, gee, everyone can be gifted if they just try hard enough. It disregards the concept of aptitude and innate ability as essential in the equation, but also sets up a lot of people for failure.

I do agree that gifted kids benefit from an environment where they will be encouraged to take risks and learn to tolerate failure.

Gail www.giftedchallenges.com

For an interesting critique of Gladwell and others, read James Delisle's latest book, The Dumbing Down of America.

There is no doubt that practise and effort and mental attitude are important to success but at the end of the day, innate ability also plays a role. I could train all day but I doubt I could beat Usain Bolt. How do I know (apart from the fact that running is not my strength)? There are talented athletes who train hard daily with excellent coaches, who can't beat Usain Bolt.

Practise will make anyone better, it might even make you quite good, but it won't make you gifted, as an athlete, as a musician or academically.

Agreed.While innate ability is a factor in ultimate level of achievement, there is much study and debate as to whether it is the largest factor or determining factor in one's achievements. Other factors under scrutiny of research include opportunity, mindset, SES, ethnic/cultural disposition toward achievement, personality. Coming full circle with the reasoning that achievement can be examined to retroactively declare the existence of giftedness, is a point used to justify hothousing and tiger parenting... essentially condoning these practices as a means to hone what can later, in retrospect, be dubbed innate giftedness. Possibly this is part of the slippery slope toward declaring that everyone is gifted: Each person finds a niche and a measure of success in life which then "proves" they were gifted all along? Possibly one's measure of success indicates the presence of other propelling factors such as opportunity, growth mindset, financial backing, environments/relationships supportive of achievement, and a buoyant/resilient personality, which took the person much farther than could have been predicted by any one factor (including intellectually gifted level of IQ) alone? Some may say it sets a lot of people up to be among the high achievers of average IQ, who outnumber gifted kids and fill the extra seats in "gifted" classes providing sufficient headcount so that classes will be held (as mentioned in the study in this thread):
There is a vast difference between identifying a person as gifted and identifying a person as selected for a gifted program.

Agreed, i could train all day at opera and may teach a level of competence, but i would never be a great opera singer and i would not insult great opera singers by claiming i could. I am.also 164 cm and dumpy so all the practice and good Lindsey in the world is going to turn me in to a sprinter or a dancer. I am quite happy to admire and support those who are gifted in those areas.

It can seem like doom and gloom at times, but there are great stories out there as well. Keep with it and you'll find your own. This last summer our DD13 went to JHU-CTY summer camp for the first time. She went expecting to enjoy the academics (and she did), but came back ecstatic at having met a camp full of kids like her. All of a sudden, she was no longer a nerdy outlier but one of dozens of "normal" kids.
Best of luck,
--S.F.

For those just starting out, you may wish to prepare with a solid foundation for creating your family's own positive story over the next decade or so, by dedicating time now to such efforts as:
1) reading all you can about advocacy
2) keeping records at home, possibly in a ring binder tabbed by year. Depending upon your child and your family's unique circumstances, this might contain such things as: reading lists, test scores, independent projects, enrichment activities, outside classes, documentation of any meetings with the school, etc.