Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Asking "why"

This sounds like DS2.25 and me. I don't hear "why" so much as "how do you think this works...", "what is meant to happen when...", "where does this come from...", "how is this similar to/different from X...", "what would happen if I/you did X...", etc.

Another big habit of DS' is to state a hypothesis and go about testing it. Sometimes these are big proclamations like, "I think there is no gravity in space", or little things like, "I think red and blue make pink". We spend a LOT of time discussing what information we'd need to test our hypotheses and, where possible, modeling things out with blocks or drawings. I scaffold with extra information to help DS move from thinking about his hypothesis to testing it, so that may cover a lot of the "why". A few weeks ago we acted out planetary orbit in John Cleese style silly walks. Answering the "why" just happens organically.

And as for the Ruf levels, I think they're a general guide. For example, for ages DS had zero interest in puzzles. Then, a few months ago, he started randomly doing 24+ piece puzzles when bored, and quickly (like under 5 minutes). Now he's totally disinterested in them again. It's so individualized.

Since no one ever put this information seeking in a different context (how instead of why), I will have to watch and listen. I had not thought of this! Thanks.

My kids are the form their own theory type. Mostly they are very logical but often wrong. Sometime I can see where they went wrong as in "i can see how you got there but you were missing a piece of information", sometimes they were funny - hatchbacks have windscreen wipers at the back because they go both ways like those double ended trains. Ds4 asks a lot of "what does 'word' mean questions. But like a lot here i talk to my kids and read to them and don't dumb down or assume they don't understand.

Database is a great analogy. Amusingly enough, I'd say that a key trait of many gifted kids is they keep their database fully indexed and normalized. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Database_normalization

DS8 doesn't question nearly as much as he used to. Don't know if he grew out of it, was socialized out of it, or has just shifted to a more internalized approach. Or maybe he just doesn't do it so much at home unless we've accidentally bought an argument from him.

DD was the same way. One day, I randomly said, "Oh look at these poor (jigsaw puzzles) dinosaurs. They are broken into pieces. We should fix them!" She was into her vet kit back then so putting jigsaw puzzles together became performing pretend surgeries. Until that day, I thought she couldn't do jigsaw puzzles. She did puzzles off and on for 6 months so the stage lasted for a bit but now, she refuses to do any. With LEGO, she happily helps me build sets but what she is really into is modifying the sets after they are built and free-play. She says following instructions is boring and there is no point in doing lego if she can't use her imagination.

DD asks a lot of why questions but they do not pertain to scientific inquiry. She uses them to question our motives and our reactions as in "Why are you getting so upset? Go calm yourself down and think about the bigger picture." She is on a musical theater and LEGO phase right now so she hasn't been talking about science much lately but when she was, instead of asking questions, she learned what she wanted on her own and processed them by "teaching" me. We're trying to balance her learning style through music lessons and so far, it's been an interesting process.

Saw this after reading this thread...

http://www.gocomics.com/frazz/2014/01/26

DS 6, asked unending "why" questions that I used to think that my ears would fall off due to the high intensity of those questions. Now, for the past year, we have the "what is it" and "how does that happen" etc thrown in with equal intensity. Sometimes, I patiently try to explain every single thing that I ever knew on that topic. At others, when I get tired of talking and need a break, I ask him to first figure out what/how/why and come up with his theory and then I would help him out to check if his answer was on the right track or not. That usually buys me a few minutes of quiet time. And then , we discuss and analyze and find the correct final answer. DS is identified as gifted.
Today's "why" question was: Why does Michael Phelps not learn martial arts and compete in the olympics now and win 22 medals in martial arts? And that led to an hour's discussion on how supreme atheletes are talented in one field and how they train for a lifetime on every single aspect of their skill and how their bodies are primed for one sport and it is mostly impossible to switch from one sport to another later on in life for them and how there are a few exceptions and who they were etc. That discussion went into greater detail than I could provide - DS is making me better at googling for info

Well, my DD likes those best of all-- because there it's a vast territory of grey area waiting to be explored... endlessly, --er, or until her victim target's energy flags, or the person manages an escape.

"Have you ever thought about..."

"Have you ever wondered..."

"Hmmm-- yeah, but what would happen if..."

Often she opens like this with some observation about world politics, human geography, environmental/political/economic theory, religion, etc. Or best of all, some intersection of them.

She has been doing this since she was about 3yo. It seems (to me) to probably be the quality that made it so difficult to consider her a young child unless you had her in your line of sight. If you were working on the bench or in a hood while you chatted with her, eventually she'd slowly turn up the level of the discussion until you were both working on an adult intellectual level before you knew it.

I also realized something just now about my DD's seeming relentlessness with adults regarding their OPINIONS. She likes to invite speculation-- often on edgy or nebulous, or just plain uncomfortable/controversial topics.

Adults are seldom comfortable saying "I don't know" to children.

I think that we like to give them "answers" to their queries, not speculation.

The DD-Inquisition often results as DD tries to ferret out their speculative side on topics of interest. But first she has to convince them that she won't just accept that opinion as gospel truth or anything, that she's just interested in what they think, and wants to discuss it.

O yes. I have one of those. It's so much fun!