Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Age or Ability Specific Forums Pre-school 4yo needing constant input?

Sorry for my very delayed response to this, all.

I have to admit that I was hoping for more responses like "Oh, it totally changes at 4.5 and then they are delightful and hardly ask questions at all", but that's probably too much to ask. Hah.

I'm periodically still having a tough time with the "MORE INPUT! MORE INPUT!" thing, and coping as best I can. I've resorted to telling him plainly when I need quiet time so I can keep being patient and nice, because I think I tend to get overwhelmed by all the talking and questions, and go way beyond the boundary I need to enforce for my own sanity. So I'm working on that a little bit.

I also get the impression that he's in the process of teaching himself to read, which is probably very stimulating to his little brain. Part of me hopes that when he learns to read a bit, he won't need as much constant input from me - but that's probably awfully optimistic!

Reading didn't help at first, but when DS mastered reading chapter books I got some much needed pockets of quiet time. I remember buying him the Magic Tree House Boxed set for his kindergarten "graduation" present and I barely heard from him for a couple of weeks. I was actually excited when he got done and came back for input.

I think he still (at 9) needs a lot of input and we both prefer that much of that come from meaningful interaction. But the books buy us down time. So it does get a little better.

School made a big difference for us. We didn't notice a change with preschool, but K...wow, he needed the down time as much as we did. DS used to talk all day, including throughout his "nap" every afternoon. Now his focus has shifted to making friends and that takes a lot of mental and physical energy. We still get the science and math questions everyday, but the intensity has diminished.

You made me laugh and smile with your hope of him growing out of it! I had that same conversation with a psychologist when my DS was 5, and he told me I would be lucky if he outgrew it by 14! I'm still holding out hope it happens before then, but until then, my saving grace continues to be Khan Academy. Those 15 minute "movies" are just enough space for both of us, and usually gets some question that I have no idea about answered. Also for learning to read at that age, Headsprout/Mimio is great. It is highly stimulating and it works in 15-20 minutes "episodes" that he can do himself.

You basically described my almost-4yo DD. Very information-needy, asks 1000 (good) questions daily & wants to know EVERY SINGLE DETAIL of everything. It definitely can be exhausting! I don't really have any insight other than to say I completely understand! My DH works constantly too so it is mainly me with her (also have a 1 1/2yo). My DD is extremely emotional and sensitive (and volatile at times) so I constantly feel like I'm walking on egg-shells trying to not rock the boat. She colors and writes about 1-2 hours a day so that is my break!

To me it sounds like your DS may be ready to be in school every day. Does he make the cut-off for Kindergarden next year?

Just read this! DD can read and she still needs the input!!! Sorry to disappoint. Though I have read here that some kids do need less once they can entertain themselves more with reading…. just didn't happen w/ DD. She wants to read to ME!

Our children are not like this at all. Maybe they just like to think about stuff without asking so many questions.

Would sports on your non-school days help a little? My guy loves sports and does heaps. It keeps his body and mind occupied.

It's nearly 11pm here. I have just shouted at my 5 year old (EG) to go back to bed for the xth time. She is early entered to school this year. She found a grade two (third year of school) maths book in her room and has been doing that for hours. I do NOT want to talk to her cos MUMMY NEEDS QUIET TIME NOW. And did I mention it's nearly 11PM?
She still talks ALL DAY except when I get some quiet time by making her go and play Minecraft. Anyone who criticises my lax parenting gets to look after her for a week and see what they think at the end of it!
And, I have three. Sigh.

My DD7 was exactly the same way, but add on needing constant physical input as well: jumping, touching, moving etc. AND loving to make noises--LOUD sounds, AND asking constant questions, singing, talking, and NEEDING from sun up to sun down on little sleep. Now at 7 she is a little better, but is in many activities : theater, singing, gymnastics, dance, DI, and a math enrichment program. Once she got into silent reading (she started reading at 2.5, but didn't disappear into longer books, novels etc. until the end of Kindergarten or maybe first grade) she would disappear into books for a long time and that quiet was a relief for me. She now writes, reads, and draws much of the time and channels her intensity into those things. She still can be intense and demanding, but it is getting better. At four, she was a jumpy, talking, touching, asking ball of fire...I could not go back and do it again! Good luck :-)

I wanted to add that we did have her tested for ADHD and discussed this with her teachers, but she is able to be very focused and on task in all her activities and so far, she does not have a diagnosis. In theater and at school, she looks like the most focused kid there and this has been a relief because she struggles to sit still in activities when she was a preschooler.