Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional DS5.3 pushed and punched the school OT?

I think you may need to look into getting him another OT. Is that possible? My son at age 6, also very non-violent, threatened to hit (i.e., lifted his hands in a menacing manner) a teacher's aid who repeatedly shamed him for his delayed fine motor skills and was very rigid with him - at the time no one was aware of the extent of his delays or of the fact that he has EDS and dysgraphia. She was a horrible match for a child with special needs and DS deteriorated behaviorally and psychologically drastically having to work with her. It's just my experience with my kid, but, it seems to me, once a kid like ours hits that point where they feel so threatened/powerless and loses trust in the OT/teacher/aide forcing the child to remain with that person isn't beneficial and can be harmful. It wasn't until I insisted he be moved to someone else did he begin to recover. He had a similar, but completely non-violent, reaction to a private OT who again was rigid and was not a good match. I immediately removed her from the team to work with him. All of his other therapists he has loved and have loved him (both his vision therapist practice and his last pt/ot practice told me the therapist fight to get to work with him ) and he also almost always enjoys his therapies. Personally, it takes some talent to work well these kids and a poor match or a poor therapists can be very detrimental.

Again, just my experience, but if I were you and had kid who is normally so rarely violent that felt that threatened with someone who is suppose to help him in fun and supportive environment I would do whatever to get a new therapist. HTH.

ETA: Can you have a heart-to-heart with your son about how he feels about the OT and what is going on? That will help. I know my DS, if asked, will tell me when he feels teacher/aide/therapists is not a good match, is disrespectful of his disability/intelligence/feelings (sometimes therapists, teachers and aides can not, at the same time, respect both the intelligence and the disability of a 2e kid, ykwim?), etc. He could also tell me that he usually likes someone but was just having a off day or whatever... Can you explore how you DS feels about this OT and his relationship with him/her?

I completely agree with this. I see it ALL of the time and it really burns me up.

I couldn't agree more with just about everything that's been said! In many ways we treat DS like a little adult because he speaks like one, thinks like and and a lot of times acts like one. Unfortunately the school only sees him as a 5-year old Kindergartner and treats him as such . The OT he had last year was GREAT! When we had a parent meeting and his preschool teacher brought up an issue of some sort, before I even said anything, the OT herself told his teacher that she needs to speak to him like to a grown up because that's what he responds to. As little time as she spent with him, she completely understood him! I have no idea who this new OT is. I don't even know if in fact this was the new OT or someone completely different because all the school note said was that he "... punched a staff member (OT)" but as far as I know, there are only two OTs. The old one and the new one.

We did have some experience with therapists that were not a good match in the past so I do know what it feels like and would not have him go through it again. It causes so much frustration and more problems arise than are solved. No therapy is better than bad therapy!

Given your professional experience, that's probably worth a word to the principal. You're such a fair and even-keeled individual that I think the principal, who seems reasonable, would be horrified to know that happened in his/her school. That example made my skim crawl; that's probably not the first time they abused children.

Yes. That does seem to cross the line between ignorance and malicious intent. Any adult who thinks that is funny shouldn't be allowed alone with children.