Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion The Santa massacre

Doctor Who. Christmas Specials-- 2006, 2007, 2008.


Santa is evil.

That's what we did with DS when he finally decided Santa wasn't real -- I told him that now he gets to BE Santa for his sister. I don't know what the heck I'll do with her, but she's the sort of imagination-heavy kid who will keep it real in her mind forever.

That's been our approach, too. "Santa" is in all of us, and really, how lovely childhood is when one has parents who love you so, isn't it?

We've never told our children that make-believe things are real. They have encountered "Santa Claus" occasionally in children's programs, so they just think of him as just another character in the lineup. I don't think they realize that some people really truly believe in these make-believe characters, but I'm sure they'll understand when they're older.

I have to give a nod to 22B on this front.

We're debating whether we'll adopt the Santa story for DS21mo. I'm on the fence. The magic of the fantasy is quite fun while it lasts. However, I remember being devastated at 5 at having been lied to by my parents. I had, the day before, defended my beliefs to older children and analogized belief in Santa to belief in God. Cue 5-year-old existential crisis...

Christmas holds deep religious meaning for us, so I'm considering a more ecclesiastical Christmas narrative for our family with a possible St. Nicholas and/or Epiphany tie-in.

I do feel bad for lying about Santa. And, I guess, being atheists makes it harder to not believe in one magical being, but then encourage the belief of another (no offense!).

For me, Santa (along with his magical friends, the Easter bunny, etc) is something special. Allow me to get out my violin: my childhood wasn't...the best. The three things that made me happy were Tintin, animals, and that euphoric feeling of waking up on Christmas day and finding presents in my stocking.

I will probably have Santa visit my house when my babies are grown men

Santa was the only thing we ever taught DD8 that wasn't true, and drawing those lines between fantasy and reality has always been a help to her in enjoying sci-fi/fantasy/horror content well beyond what you'd expect for her years (last week, for example, she enjoyed The Omen). It doesn't scare her at all. Current events have the kind of impact you'd expect on an 8yo, because that's real. DW and I have to be careful what we discuss with her in earshot in that regard, and if DD hears something she doesn't like, she'll demand we stop talking about it.

My own DD had the opposite of your existential crisis, though... she had an epiphany on a topic she'd been bothered about for years. We're a nonreligious family in a religious area, so we had to address the subject with her at an early age, from our perspective. This was leading to some intolerance on her part, and some rather pointless arguments with her playmates, because she couldn't understand why some people chose to believe. When she decided "I want to believe" in Santa, I analogized that attitude with religious beliefs, and that was something she could understand and respect.

We never introduced Santa to DS, the rest of the world did. So we rolled with his version, his expectations. Interestingly at 6, he decided that the tooth fairy was not real, that was just parents and why give away teeth when you can look at them under the microscope - so his teeth are now in a bowl in his room, yea? But the epiphany about tooth fairy didn't translate into Santa. I think the fact that his older cousins believe allows him to suspend disbelief.

The Santa thing has been much easier than the day I inadvertently destroyed his childhood - the day I pointed out look see that Klingon on Star Trek iv, close your eyes, who does it sound like, yes it's Hacker from cyberchase - cue massive tears, shattered belief system - he thought cyberchase was a real place and had planned on going so he could fix motherboard and save the day. Wow, I felt so bad. I think Santa will be easier on us.

About the tooth fairy thing, I do tell DS that others believe and we need to respect others beliefs and not challenge them about it. Fortunately, he doesn't seem to remember the wrenching cognitive dissonance of several years ago so ignores the irony in my parenting!

DeHe

DS asked about Santa right before he turned four (he has a December bday). At that time I didn't want to tell him the truth right before Christmas, and he seemed so young. But this year right after Christmas he was still talking about it, and I decided that for a kid like himself, it would be better for him not to keep lying to him even under the guise of, "just a fun tradition". Knowing him, I know he would not take it well, and it would call into question everything else I told him - including religious beliefs - and I didn't want those to get tangled in his mind with fairy tales, myths, etc. I still feel really odd about having to break it to him so young...he didn't even make it to his first "Tooth Fairy" visit. On that night, he told me to go dress up in my fairy costume and get my wand so that I could trick him. BTW, he still wants to believe and pretend in it - just for fun.

Well, has she read Superfudge? (That book thoroughly debunks Santa. We had to turn the tape down in a hurry when listening to it in the car with DS4!)

DD reacted sort of like Dude's DD. She had been pestering me about it for YEARS and I'd said "What do you think?" and blah blah. Finally she INSISTED on the truth, and seemed kind of disappointed. She now has decided it's mre fun to believe, so she goes along with it, also for her brother's sake. She doesn't seem to really care about the tooth fairy anymore, though.