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Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 2,007
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Joined: Jul 2011
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Could someone please define "soft skills"? What is it about them that makes them "soft"? Soft skills = interpersonal dynamics. Things related to human nature and culture. Self-regulation of your internal world in terms of getting things done, flexibility, etc. Hard skills = Mathematics. Calculus. Internal Combustion Engines. Astronomy. Objective stuff related to the outside physical/natural world. At least, that's my off the cuff answer. Soft means that they aren't governed by hard and fast rules. For example, there is no "law of physics" for how to talk to an angry customer.
Last edited by JonLaw; 06/20/13 08:35 AM.
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Joined: Feb 2011
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There also is no algorithm for "how to get an impossible number of tasks done on-time," but people who can find a way manage to make themselves pretty much indispensable, and those who can't are often the first ones to go in a restructuring.
I think that some individuals are just not as capable when it comes to theory of mind, quite honestly. Problem-solving that involves other people requires it, because your solutions ideally will not make enemies out of your boss or coworkers.
Bostonian's example demonstrates that principle in action, actually. There's more than simple problem-solving at work there-- 'getting free' is one solution, yes, but one that would have consequences for the other individual which would ultimately render it non-ideal interpersonally. Some individuals would never have even seen that. Maybe not even in hindsight.
I suspect that modern helicopter parenting also contributes to very low level development of theory of mind in afflicted offspring, in addition to the more obvious learned helplessness that Wren discussed. It just never occurs to some individuals that other people have thoughts, feelings, and personal agendas. Seems to me that this is an increasingly serious problem, in fact-- the belief that the world exists to fulfill one's personal needs and wants, I mean.
TO be clear, I recognize that this is a lifelong challenge for some individuals who are not NT. But that is not the people I am referring to. I'm referring to otherwise NT people who simply haven't ever really had it reinforced to them that they should consider others as part of decision-making.
Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.
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Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 3,299 Likes: 2
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Okay, that is just...blechy (to me at least). 
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Joined: Feb 2011
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My post? Or being head-locked as part of an... er... "interview process?"
Because I can think of SO many reasons why the latter would make me turn DOWN a job offer...
Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.
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Joined: Sep 2007
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My post? Or being head-locked as part of an... er... "interview process?"
Because I can think of SO many reasons why the latter would make me turn DOWN a job offer... Oops! The headlock thing.
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Joined: Nov 2012
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Hmm, I like the example. It might seem abrasive, but the type of soft skills that Friedman was testing in the headlock manoeuvre are exactly the kinds of abilities a good I-banker needs: quick thinking, being able to behave appropriately within the politics of an organization, using the resources at hand (his wrestling acumen), grace under pressure...
It's also a great 3 second test for organizational fit. I hate to say it, but ibankers face considerably more workplace assault than that in a standard day. They have to have thick skin and roll with the punches.
Too bad a move like that would land Friedman in an assault lawsuit today. So much information could be gained that way in the blink of an eye. Instead, a psychologist would have to design that as an "assessment center" and waste tens, if not hundreds, of thousands of dollars on set-up and interview slots with senior bankers.
What is to give light must endure burning.
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Or, they could just learn to behave. Which would include maybe not wrecking the world economy.
There is that.
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Joined: Feb 2011
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ROFL. I think it's increasingly clear why some of us are quite ill-suited to that form of employment. Feels that physical assailants should not be bosses or interviewers.... check.I can't IMAGINE what this dude would have come up with to similarly "test" a female candidate. 
Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.
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Joined: May 2011
Posts: 741
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But employers have pretty much shrugged off the idea that workers should be trained. They tend to look for the fully-qualified individual, which means experienced in their particular line of business, with their particular set of tools. Then they wonder why they get so few applicants. Sort of like the real estate situation. When there's little on the market, homeowners who wish to sell don't have to spruce up much of anything; the looks of the home, the price, the terms, etc. They call the shots. That's how employers think these days, imo. They know that they have what many "buyers" want and so they ask for the moon. Perhaps those "buyers" realize they need to spruce themselves up and so listen to those who say go back to school. Who could blame them? Where else are they to get the required "must haves"? Especially true in the case of a change in career due to "free trade" with other countries out-sourcing one's prior area of expertise.
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Joined: Nov 2012
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ROFL. I think it's increasingly clear why some of us are quite ill-suited to that form of employment. Feels that physical assailants should not be bosses or interviewers.... check.I can't IMAGINE what this dude would have come up with to similarly "test" a female candidate.  Easy answer: there were none.
What is to give light must endure burning.
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