Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Second Guessing Acceleration Choices

For the most part, I am confident of the choices that I make for my children in regards to choices to accelerate or not or how much. I think part of that is an occupation hazard in the sense that in theory I am required to advise clients on a course of action but in reality they pretty much do what I choose. That confidence and forward momentum is essential in a professional context but in parenting not so much.

Most days I think the decisions were all good, but on occasion (now that I have more time on my hands) I question and worry . . . in both directions. For my rising 5th grader DS, I wonder if I held him back too much by choosing pre-algebra rather than algebra for 4th grade. He took a national algebra readiness test and scored exceptionally high. It is my understanding that the test is designed to differentiate well at the tail so he is exceptionally ready for algebra in the fall. Is he too ready? Was it a mistake to have held off a year? On the other hand,and I know I am being contradictory here, have I accelerated him too much? He is now destined to be and has been so out of step with his peers and relegated to once a week instruction or internet courses with the exception of one course in middle school and a couple of courses in high school. He is fortunate to have had access to acceleration, but it has not come without a price, even minor issues like missing parts of recess, having homework when his classmates didnt't, getting in trouble for missing his regular teacher's directions because he wasn't there, and in general having to be super responsible because he worked alone four days a week. Was it worth it?

For my rising 5th grader DD, I have chosen to go through the other door. Granted she is not even near DS' level in math, but both from her Explore(above DYS cut) and MAP (above pre-algebra cut) scores as well as general performance with math curriculum , she can easily handle pre-algebra in the fall. However, she is well aware of the "non-math" requirements and has clearly indicated that she does not want to accelerate, so she will stick with the 5th grade GT math, which is 6th grade math with enrichment.

Part of the reason for all this "soul searching" is the additional uncertainty brought about by Common Core. It has not been officially announced, but I was privy to advance notice that the school/district will be modifying (phasing out?) the GT program, starting with just reading/language arts in the fall. Instead of just one GT class using one-level above curriculum, they will spread out the GT students and make advance curriculum available to all. I can sympathize with the students who are currently shut out of the GT curriculum, but the issue will be rather students in the former GT classes will have effective access to the same level of instruction.

Sorry - I am just kind of whining . . . and contemplating.

Quantum2003, I think everyone who frequents these forums is likely to have felt the very same doubt and done the same second guessing that you're going through. I've learned having gone through the gamut with DS19 and DS15 that all you can do is what you think best at the time, evaluate, and adjust when possible. As one recent post stated, "GT kids pretty much have to have their education adjusted on a weekly basis for the best outcome."

My advice is, don't spend too much time lamenting, you can drive yourself crazy with thoughts that start with, "What if....." You expect to make some mistakes as a parent, it's not less true as a GT parent, very much likely more so. Evaluate, adjust when needed but don't try to fix what isn't broken and accept that with GT education, you'll likely never have the ideal situation regardless of which direction you take.

I think that there is a component to this which relates to being data-driven people and parents of HG+ kids, too. We're used to ONLY making evidence-based decisions. The more data the better, right?

Only here, there is no road map. Each and every HG+ child is a completely unique individual in multiple ways, and there is no 'evidence-based best practices' to work from in most ways. Oh, sure-- we know what the negatives are for any particular set of decisions... and we have anecdote from those who have gone before us... and we know our own kids.

But we don't even have anecdote which reflects our child's current and future circumstances (due to shifts within cultural and educational practices) nevermind those which reflect our child's individual asynchrony at any one point in time-- which is also a moving target.

In other words, we're all flying blind and working with very little beyond what our gut-level feelings about choices tell us to do, and observations about individual outcomes after we have made those choices.

Not easy for people like my DH and myself. We are problem-solvers who are very evidence/data-driven. This business of relying on instinct to make good decisions makes us crazy sometimes.

We're the same way HowlerKarma, however, the evidence has show that when we go with our instinct we're pleased with the outcome much more often than when we don't! I can't count the number of times I've though, "You bone head, you had an instinct that something was wrong but you didn't act on it, when will you learn?"

Thanks, Old Dad. That is so true. I am reminded that as a brand new parent, I made my sister (a veteran parent with four kids at the time) laugh when I complained that unlike school/work, I couldn't see any clear way to master parenting.

HowlerKarma, the funny thing is while I do evaluate data, I have always been very intuition-driven, which drives other people crazy. I have been known to work backwards and use data to support what my gut instantly told me in the first place. I have been told that is just so unscientific . . . at which point I have to respond that I am the opposite of a scientist.

The problem is that there is no owner's manual . . . altough I have to admit that I almost never read manuals and have built many items, including furniture, by feel, with the occasion mistakes, which were mostly correctable.

An owner's manual didn't come with your child when they were born either, however, your intuition has served you just fine thus far

Totally agree with Old Dad And fwiw, I put a *lot* of weight into my children's feelings- especially by the time they are in upper elementary. Your choice for your dd incorporates what *she* wants, and for that reason alone I think it's a good choice. I also imagine that if at some point in time a few years down the road there's a concern that she will not be able to get into an advanced science class because she's a year behind the pre-reqs in math - if it's something she really wants to be in, she can make up that missed year of math through an online or summer school class. Sometimes I think we tend to over-worry or over-press for math acceleration (in particular) since it's so easy to quantify as a subject and to check off the boxes in a linear fashion - pre-algebra precedes algebra precedes geometry etc. Not all of our HG+/EG/PG kiddos are going to be interested and passionate about math simply because they have high IQs - some of our kids are going to be passionate about the arts or about literature or whatever, so for those kids, I see no reason to worry for one minute that they aren't accelerated in math. For the child that lives/breathes/ and wants the acceleration, absolutely press for it.

One question I have for you - which is actually coming from a somewhat cynical place.... - why would Common Core be a reason to eliminate a gifted program? I will admit to not entirely understanding how CC is being implemented across the US... but a small part of me wonders if that's not just an excuse when really there is a budget issue... or perhaps an administrator is simply trying to make their mark by mixing things up? I'd be really concerned about the impact on academics for gifted kids as a result of the change.

polarbear

Here is NAGC's response to your question polarbear

http://www.nagc.org/index2.aspx?id=8980

Mine did:
http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/b5e5/

Loved that book.