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THis is an idea. I could say something like this to him. I mean, seriously, how does the team not understand "provide a scribe for multiple written sentences." They are making it so much harder than necessary - it is not in need of this much interpretation... just scribe for the kid, period - you don't have to worry about his stamina or his fatigue or anything. I am on that we have medical people and therapist galore doing that ... you just do your job, ie, teach and provide a scribe. Sheesh! I think he really doesn't like that I am documenting in writing that the IEP is being violated (I also think he got upset when the teacher response to me substantiated clearly that she is not following the iep consistently.

I am thinking of saying something like "oh how kind of you, Mr. Principal, but I do not think that will be necessary at this time. I do believe I memorialized the "common understanding" quite clearly in my email, it really isn't that complicated. Quite simply, the scribing accommodations are necessary to minimize the impact of the disability of congenital hypotonia and joint hypermobility and allow DS to access his education. But how lovely of you to offer since I know how busy everyone is[..blah, blah, blah...] I do look forward to hearing about your meeting with Mrs. Paraprofessional, however. Please let me know how it went. Ds reported to me that she has been much more supportive this week so it seems that your talk with her was productive?"

SO I forwarded the email form the principal to the coordinator at Parent Education Network and she said if she would come with me... She just cant come at 8am so I need to get them to do it at another time. That is very hard to do as they always insist that we do it at 8a but I think this time I am going to insist that we do at at another time so that she can join me. I should tell them I will have her with me, right?

You make yourself and your DS's needs very clear in your emails and I wouldn't stop addressing concerns and reminders in emails simply because you're asked not to. You have every right. You're doing a great job. I like the idea of having someone with you to take notes during the meeting. And perhaps give yourself a "script" to go in with and try not to let them veer you from it. What you're asking for is not unreasonable and it's their responsibility to provide it.
Please let us know how it went...

My understanding is that you'll need to tell them if you bring a lawyer because they'll have to have their own there as well. But you aren't required to tell them you're bringing anyone else.

In my first few meetings with our school about my son's dyslexia and 504, I told them I was bringing a dyslexia expert (either the head of the dyslexia tutoring company we used, or my son's dyslexia tutor, who was a former special ed teacher herself), and I think that prompted them to bring in their own district expert. I do believe it resulted in a great 504 because the school wanted to prove that they were doing everything they could. (Which wasn't much, since he didn't qualify for an IEP.)

In your case, I would let them know-- I think it would send the message that you're serious. But I wouldn't give them a lot of details. I think you might just tell them that you're bringing an advocate or expert and that she can't come at 8 a.m., and the suggest some times that do work.

Yes, if it's a lawyer - most of the lawyers that I have talked to in this field have said they like the school district to have their lawyer there as well if they are going. They have said it usually makes things go smoother - often the school district lawyer knows the parent's lawyer professionally and both know what's what and makes things go above-board better.

This women is an educational advocate ... Though it looks like she has worked for a law firm in her past doing this kind of work I don't think she is a barred attorney. Nonetheless I told them she is coming. I wrote this:

"How very kind of you to offer to take time out of your busy schedule to have yet another IEP meeting. I personally do not feel that another meeting is necessary at this time as I feel very comfortable that my last email correspondence memorialized, quite clearly and succinctly, our common understanding with regard to the implementation of the writing accommodations. Of course, if there are still some issues about which the IEP team is unclear, I would be happy to meet again. It would be very helpful to know ahead of time about what issues the team is unclear, so that I can prepare - perhaps bring some educational materials if someone does not understand congenital hypotonia and hypermobility, etc. I personally am only unclear on what the results of your meeting with Mrs. Paraprofessional were and how the "baseline" for the anxiety goal is to be determined. I am more than happy to hear about those two issues via email correspondence or telephone.

Unfortunately, an 8:00am meeting is not possible for us due to work, childcare and school issues with both DS and our younger child. Also, I will be bringing an educational advocate with me and that person also can not make an 8:00am meeting. Could you please send two or three dates that the team would be available for a 10:00am or 10:30am meeting? Thank you so very much."

Seriously. I can't believe he doesn't want to communicate by email anymore ... It's like who doesn't communicate by email in this day and age? I guess I can always mail actual letters LOL. But I am not going to stop putting things "in writing". I really think he is concerned because the teacher's own emails are a bit incriminating in that she basically admits to not following the IEP properly so he probably doesn't want any of them putting anything in writing to me anymore.

Love your email! I think it might make him rethink the meeting! But I'll bet you get a phone call after this.

Honestly, I owe it all to the advice and support/encouragement I get here. Thank you guys. You all really give me a lot to think about and even 'ways of wording things' ykwim? You all are so wonderful. I hope just by posting all this here helps others... this is an unnerving world - this world of ieps and school districts fighting accommodations...

OO--OO!! Pick me! I know this one.

People who don't want to communicate with you in writing are responding that way because they are (oh, what's the polite term here? "weasel" seems SO harsh...) um...

mostly interested in protecting portions of their own anatomy from potential harm?

In all seriousness, the people who LEAST WANT to communicate with me in writing are mostly the people with whom it proves to be MOST essential to do so in a fairly scrupulous manner. :ahem: