Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Have you ever felt like you were no longer gifted?

@momosam : I am not sure I am familiar with the late-bloomer expression. Is it about evolving at your pace ? If it is I may be one.
Concerning my psychologist, I think like she wanted me to take a look at the life I am currently living and ask myself if it's how I want it to be.

Truth is I don't know. I'm living at Mother's and I don't have a job because of all the treatments I have to do this year. I, for sure, do not plan to stay at her's forever but she wanted to and I'm glad she did not to me when I said: "no" !
And even when I am done with my treatments, I'll be okay being a random human being. All I want is being better at making music and computer related things. I hope I would not regret this non-ambitious way of life I chose in 10 years.


@moomin : You just talked like a teacher I used to know, who was saying I was idle besides my good grades and that would never do something I'm proud of if I not doing it a 100%.


@dude : I never wanted to achieve something great, but some people wanted and still want me too. I am a very anxious person, I can't deal with pressure and I'm putting pressure on myself I end up behaving like Van Gogh ! I can be a little sensitive sometimes.

Mother told me the same thing about being a parent. I think my greatest journey is waited for me.


@deacongirl : thanks to the answers I had I understand that being gifted is who I am. But some people are mean about and sometimes make a fool of me because I don't know something they do. Maybe it's my fault, perhaps I did not behave well once so they remind me I'm not all-mighty. I don't know I'm going to think about it.

@aquinas : what is it with being a parent ? I mean where the kids are from should I order one on Amazon or something ?!
I already learn a few things from my mistakes, one is to carefully pick my friends. I don't know why I tend to believe that all the people are genuinely good. I am a real dummy in socialising.

@Edwin I wish I was 50 settled and all, so that the "what I'm going to do" questions were gone. But it's a silly statement isn't ? Life is an evolving path.
Also what you said made noticed that I kind of gave up.

@ColinsMum : I'm sorry for the "over-dramatic" feel. I did not mean to. It's just that understanding thing has always been the only thing I was really good at. So I felt a little left alone. Besides I googled Carol Dweck, and I'll borrow some books at the library.


@HowlerKarma : Whatever I'm doing doubt is here, it's really disturbing. I mean music is my thing but most of the time I'm not satisfied with what I am doing or I think music is not meant for me, which could be true. Who knows ?...

Thank you for all of your answers I'd like to be able to help someone as intelligently someday.

Hello everyone,

I did write and post an answer a couple of days ago, but now I wonder if I posted it. anyway.

First of all I want to thank all of you for your answers and advices toward my "over-dramatic" statement/topic !

I was a little bit moved when I wrote this thread.
Now that I am calmer, I feel like my psychologist was right about my arty shenanigans" I do am a musician but I no longer wants to be a professional musician, since most of the musicians I've been playing are not in a democratic mood, they always tell me what to do and not to do. It made this passion I had no longer pleasing at all. It would not be such a big deal if I was a leader but I'm definitely not. I mostly play the drums and the bass, so I'm a little doomed here !


I taught and still am, to myself about acoustics, sound design and audio mixing, and it makes me so happy I am jabbering all day long about these subjects. It even made start doing physics again.

My psychologist once told me she could hear the knowledge and the happiness when I was explaining what I was doing and that there must be something to work on. I never thought about it until today.

I have always been working to get what I have. But these days I gave up and did not even noticed it before. I've been seriously whining, like: "how, I miss my brains" of course you do silly-rabbit, it's not easy doing nothing.


For the record: I am currently unemployed because of my health, and the treatments they give me at the hospital, are hard to deal with sometimes. But now that my organism is a little more used to it I have more energy to complain and be fed up with the situation. (what I unfortunately did)

I don't know if any of you or perhaps your kids ever felt like they were never doing something good no matter what. But I hope I'd be able to get rid of this non-healthy thinking.

Thank you again, and my bad I drifted away from the subject. Rendez-vous to the brag topic if I am achieving something someday

My daughter often feels this way. It makes me very sad, because it is not true. But it feels true in her mind. She can see what COULD be, and feels that nothing in real life can be as good, so by comparison it must not measure up to possibility. This is partly her perfectionism; it can really poison a person's thinking about themselves.

Your recent posts indicate that you are learning and thinking hard! It sounds as though you are in a better place in your thinking now that you're "moving" to understand and change things inside.


I'm so glad that you have a passion that engages so many of your abilities and interests at the same time. That's very important to exercise our gifted brains, I think. Your words sound very joyful when you talk about this passion.

I understand. This is not something that is healthy. At some point you have to let go of other people's expectations, because it's not their life, it's yours. And then you have to decide... I have this life, now what do I want to do with it?


And just to be clear, the message I'm trying to send here is not, "go make a baby." It's just that "great" can be found in unexpected places, and you can define "great" to mean whatever it means to you. For some people it's the quest for fortune and/or fame. For others it's to be found in making little differences in people's lives every day, or learning something new. There are a number of possibilities, and you're free to choose, or make up your own.

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This sounds like perfectionism, which is a very common trait among the gifted, and gifted females in particular. It's not a good thing in general, but it's particularly tough when your passion is music, because in music, there's no such thing as perfect. There will always be some who like it, and some who don't. You can't please everybody.

The best approach there is to make music to please yourself, and then if you enjoy it, share it with others who also enjoy it.

Every once in a while, things settle into a sort of routine in my life, and I'll get into a place where it feels like I'm not using my brain anymore, and it's dying. So I'll find some new interest or hobby, and I'm good.

Oh no. It's not what I meant... I wanted to say that I was eager to find this very thing that would make me feel as complete as some of you appear to be, and less morose concerning future.




I never thought of myself as a perfectionist, but as someone who likes things to be done right. I don't like to bodge neither when people do it. I don't get it.

I would say the key is to learn how to accept ambiguity with equanimity. I think everyone struggles with ambiguity when they're at a crossroads because the drive for security and stability is so human. Sadly, I don't have a great roadmap for you, just a suggestion to let your interests be your compass.

(I think I beat that travel metaphor to death, didn't I!)

Hell yeah ! (or like it's said in french "Grave !" which is funny to use right after you)

Hello there, how is life ?

I for myself recently experienced an heavy depression and was committed to a clinic. I am way better and I even start to believe in a future for myself. For that matter I have some news (drum roll) on autumn I'll go to night school in order to learn maths and physics. I am very happy, as well as quite tense. I hope everything will be fine.

—linje

I am glad that things seem to be improving for you now. Very good news that you've had success in treating your depression! It is so important to take good care of ourselves.