Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional Asperger's? Or what?

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Hi Waits,
I think you are in the right place to start. Let's see: Is she in kindergarten? Are they learning the alphabet and three-letter rhyming words? At home is she reading The Magic Treehouse? Are her friends outside of school mostly a bit older or have close interests in common? Does she play with math at home, and they are learning to count at school?

If so, sounds like a sensitive, self-aware, highly gifted kid dropped into an environment completely out-of-synch with her needs. There are a ton of articles around and threads here. Some sympathy for the teachers involved... at a 150 IQ, that is less than 1 in 1000 kids: so a teacher teaching 25 kids a year for 40 years on average will have one student in your daughter's range in their whole career.

My only recommendation - do NOT use the school psychologist for eval or diagnostic purposes. Go get your own eval done through a developmental pediatrician or neuropsychologist of your choice.

My son did not play with his classmates at that age either as they shared zero interests. He did have friends that I found for him outside of school who shared his interests. He is now 2 years grade skipped (age 10 in 7th) and fine socially -- the kind of kid who has a couple of good friends, but no interest in the big social groups. Kids with high IQs can be misunderstood in so many ways.... I second the idea that whatever you do, don't use your school psych to investigate this issue.

Oh yeah, as a new user, it can take a day or so for your response to appear in thread. Wanted to add, this is one of my favorite intro articles (Small Poppies):
http://www.davidsongifted.org/db/Articles_id_10124.aspx

I agree with epoh about using a private neuropsych rather than the school psychologist.

From what you describe, I think you are right to look for answers other than Asperger's.

Sounds to me like you have a "way out there" gifted child, dropped into a situation where she feels absolutely NO connection to her so-called "peers". Really, kids with such high IQ's sometimes don't feel like they fit in and therefore, isolate themselves.

Who knows, could be Asbergers. But I am suspecting it all being related to her very high intelligence and she is being completely misunderstood.

Still, can't hurt to get an evaluation from a PRIVATE psychologist.

When my son was five and in kindergarten he too was very articulate, was interested in a lot of different things and loved to talk about his interests to older friends and adults because kids his age did not understand what he was talking about and did not get the jokes that he made or understand the high level words that he used in his speech. When he was about nine I remember hearing a girl his age in musical theater class telling her friend that he was speaking in some geeky language that only geeks understand. Only his older friends (three and four years older) really seemed to enjoy talking to him. They had no trouble understanding him. They loved his sense of humor, his knowledge of technology and his knowledge of video games. They were the ones that invited him to birthday parties and to spend the night at their houses, not the kids his age.

Some teachers in our small town public school thought he must have asperger's because he read at a 5th grade level or maybe even higher before he started kindergarten and he could do mental math including some multiplication. What he couldn't well was physical things like coloring in the lines. We told the kindergarten teacher he had hypotonia and some sensory issues but I think she thought it was more evidence of asperger's. He did not really have behavior issues except when he was told to do a lot of coloring in the lines. He was supposed to color "letter people" and he got so sick of coloring that he would scribble. Scribbling instead of coloring in the lines was his only act of defiance. I think there might have been more acts of defiance if he had been in school all day instead of a half day and not allowed to learn at his level. He would come home after he got out of school and learn new things online.

Not one doctor has ever suggested that he had asperger's and he has been to a lot of them because of physical issues.

I'd see a private psychologist to sort this out, preferably one who has experience with gifted girls and autism spectrum disorders, so you can get a definitive answer.

At the very least, you want to solve the problem with not following directions and the feeling overwhelmed. That in itself would be worth seeing someone about, IMO; it's not typical behavior.

Being upset that others have friends and not following instructions can be related to Asperger's but can also be attributable to other things.

DeeDee

Your description of your daughter sounds like my DD, as well as like me (even down to the IQ, lol), and neither of us have Asperger's.

If the school thinks they see something there's no harm in seeking professional advice (I agree with the others - do it privately, NOT through the school). From your description though she sounds like she just can't connect with that particular peer group, and also may be an introvert which is why she finds the environment overwhelming. Introvert does not automatically equal spectrum. I'm the same way... I hate large groups. I much prefer one on one.

Anyway, I wouldn't panic, but you could see your doctor anyway... at the very least this will make the school happy, and they'll see you as a team player (even though they're likely wrong about the Aspergers).