|
1 members (saclos),
223
guests, and
17
robots. |
|
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
S |
M |
T |
W |
T |
F |
S |
|
|
|
|
|
|
1
|
2
|
|
3
|
4
|
5
|
6
|
7
|
8
|
9
|
|
10
|
11
|
12
|
13
|
14
|
15
|
16
|
|
17
|
18
|
19
|
20
|
21
|
22
|
23
|
|
24
|
25
|
26
|
27
|
28
|
29
|
30
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2012
Posts: 1,733
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: May 2012
Posts: 1,733 |
What I would do, is continue to say that you want medical causes looked at FIRST before any behavioral analysis or intervention is done. And if you feel you have good medical explanations and there is still some behavioral issue, insist that medical information be taken into account. By not letting them get at the medical records, you've put them in a bind. But, if they are only looking at the records to support their viewpoints, they won't see what you need them to see. It reminds me of when schools used to force kids to be medicated for ADHD. (see link below). Maybe you can use some of that info in your case. http://www.webmd.com/add-adhd/news/20051116/schools-cant-require-adhd-drugsI think this is such good advice. Thanks 
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2012
Posts: 1,733
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: May 2012
Posts: 1,733 |
I can totally understand why you might not trust the professionals in this case. They have shown that they are knowledgeable about disorders other than your sons and that's great if your kid has that. Exactly.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2012
Posts: 1,733
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: May 2012
Posts: 1,733 |
And a correct label offers a handle for teachers and peers who would otherwise label a child "a behavior problem," "a bad kid," or worse-- I would much rather my DS and his peers know he has a disability than think he is a "bad kid." Totally agree! This is exactly what I want as well! But I want them to have the RIGHT disability not one that is not DS - i.e, hypotonia and vision disorder and related anxiety not something DS does not have. And, yes, I hear you that since some of the same accomodations for, say, ADHD overlap with the vision disorder (like breaks) so I should be okay with an ADHD label for example b/c even though it doesn't fit b/c either way he still gets his breaks BUT I just am NOT comfortable with that. And I honestly don't know much about ADHD - I do know how the vision thing is affecting DS and I do know what he needs for it. YKIM? I want them to give him the breaks because they know that his eyes are fatigued and strained not because they think he has ADHD... I am sorry if that if that makes me a bad person or bad mom or whatever but I am just not comfortable with it. I truly think that a wrong label would only hurt DS and I am not willing to do it.
Last edited by marytheres; 09/16/12 12:53 PM.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 978
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 978 |
I'm sorry it makes you feel pursued in a bad way-- if "child find" is what's going on here, I actually find it good that someone is taking that legal obligation seriously. It certainly isn't taken seriously where we are. Perhaps you could just ask the psych why s/he thinks what she thinks and why s/he is taking the actions s/he is. No, not at all. I'm like you in that I believe in trying to help kids when they need it. I don't really feel affected by whatever motives they have. I'm taking a leap of faith and assuming that their primary goal is to help our kids. Why wouldn't it be? They're actually not taking any action at all, just suggesting that I look into ASD further (and this is after I've already had a psychologist rule it out, so it's not like they have an issue with any apathy or non-compliance on my part). I think that each parent's experience is affected by their own level of involvement. I don't think they "take action" with me because I'm already proactive. I might be having a different experience with them if I ignored their concerns and refused to have DS tested. Also they've never said anything about any legal obligation to identify kids with issues. It doesn't mean there is no obligation - I just haven't heard about it. They have said, though, several times, that an ASD tag gets better funding. Maybe they're trying to motivate me rather than make me feel pressured? Who knows. Whatever - it is what it is. They're not looking to falsely tag anyone - they just don't want me to miss a funding opportunity. If DS is assessed by our provincial autism network and found to not be on the spectrum, then the school district would cross that off their list of possible care options.
Last edited by CCN; 09/16/12 01:19 PM.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 978
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 978 |
I want them to give him the breaks because they know that his eyes are fatigued and strained not because they think he has ADHD... I am sorry if that if that makes me a bad person or bad mom or whatever but I am just not comfortable with it. I truly think that a wrong label would only hurt DS and I am not willing to do it. That doesn't make you a bad person - it makes you a caring, involved parent Each education setting has a slightly different climate, and you know better than anyone what impact each diagnosis would have on your particular situation. I my DS's case I'm just trying to work with what I have. I would love to have the correct diagnosis for him, whatever that is. Some kids are clear cut, and some are not. DS is an enigma - he doesn't really fit anywhere. My comments here would have been a lot different a year ago... but now I'm at the point of letting go of my prior idealism and instead taking what I have and making it work.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2011
Posts: 739
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Aug 2011
Posts: 739 |
marytheres I don't think anyone who takes the time to research these issues, find this board, read all the information posted here and then post asking questions to help their child could EVER be thought of as a bad person or a bad parent. No way. And I don't think anyone here implied that. Sometimes advocating for your child is just exhausting - physically and emotionally. It really takes a toll. Ask any parent here - we've all been right where you find yourself now. Passionately advocating for your child while at the same time trying to figure out just what it is that s/he needs.
You and I share an unfortunate experience - someone in the school who has made the situation worse. MUCH worse. And a child who has responded very, VERY badly to that person's actions. If the pysch saw only the result of your son's exposure to this person she may have legitimately believed that "in her professional opinion" she was seeing something that needs to be addressed. It doesn't mean that she is right and it doesn't mean that you are wrong for fighting to keep that label away from your child.
Hopefully with the new correct diagnosis your son's needs will be met more appropriately. With an improved learning environment hopefully there will be no further behavior issues so it will be a moot point. However if his anxiety is triggered again somehow, just as my daughter's was when a substitute triggered her memories of her terrible kindergarten experience, you may want to revisit the issue. If this happens it doesn't mean that you are wrong, or a bad parent or anything else. It just means that figuring all this out is a process. It is hell while you are in the worst of it but I for one have to hope that we can come out the other side with situations as successful as DeeDee's, polarbear's, mon's and the other parents further along on this path who so patiently stick around this board to help us through the rough patches.
{hugs} to you.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 2,498
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 2,498 |
If DS is assessed by our provincial autism network and found to not be on the spectrum, then the school district would cross that off their list of possible care options. Aha-- provincial. You're in Canada. I know nothing about how the law works in Canada. My apologies. DeeDee
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 2,498
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 2,498 |
And a correct label offers a handle for teachers and peers who would otherwise label a child "a behavior problem," "a bad kid," or worse-- I would much rather my DS and his peers know he has a disability than think he is a "bad kid." I want them to give him the breaks because they know that his eyes are fatigued and strained not because they think he has ADHD... I am sorry if that if that makes me a bad person or bad mom or whatever but I am just not comfortable with it. I truly think that a wrong label would only hurt DS and I am not willing to do it. I'm definitely not saying to allow your child to be mislabeled. I would argue against that too. Just saying that the right label has uses, and there is nothing wrong with "labeling" per se if the labels are correct and used correctly. No, I would not let them "diagnose" something that is not there; if need be bring an advocate or an outside professional to the meeting to help you make your case to the team until you are satisified that they understand what's going on. If School Psych is concerned about behaviors she's seen in the past, but those behaviors are not there now, let her know you'd be happy to revisit the issue if those problems re-surface. There really isn't a point in taking data on something that isn't there, and any behavior analysis should be based on data. It's really important that the IEP reflect reality to the best extent possible. DeeDee
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 978
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 978 |
If DS is assessed by our provincial autism network and found to not be on the spectrum, then the school district would cross that off their list of possible care options. Aha-- provincial. You're in Canada. I know nothing about how the law works in Canada. My apologies. DeeDee No worries Some of it may be the same anyway... I'm not sure of the differences either.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2012
Posts: 1,733
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: May 2012
Posts: 1,733 |
marytheres I don't think anyone who takes the time to research these issues, find this board, read all the information posted here and then post asking questions to help their child could EVER be thought of as a bad person or a bad parent. No way. And I don't think anyone here implied that. Sometimes advocating for your child is just exhausting - physically and emotionally. It really takes a toll. Ask any parent here - we've all been right where you find yourself now. Passionately advocating for your child while at the same time trying to figure out just what it is that s/he needs.
You and I share an unfortunate experience - someone in the school who has made the situation worse. MUCH worse. And a child who has responded very, VERY badly to that person's actions. If the pysch saw only the result of your son's exposure to this person she may have legitimately believed that "in her professional opinion" she was seeing something that needs to be addressed. It doesn't mean that she is right and it doesn't mean that you are wrong for fighting to keep that label away from your child.
Hopefully with the new correct diagnosis your son's needs will be met more appropriately. With an improved learning environment hopefully there will be no further behavior issues so it will be a moot point. However if his anxiety is triggered again somehow, just as my daughter's was when a substitute triggered her memories of her terrible kindergarten experience, you may want to revisit the issue. If this happens it doesn't mean that you are wrong, or a bad parent or anything else. It just means that figuring all this out is a process. It is hell while you are in the worst of it but I for one have to hope that we can come out the other side with situations as successful as DeeDee's, polarbear's, mon's and the other parents further along on this path who so patiently stick around this board to help us through the rough patches.
{hugs} to you. Thanks! I don't think anyone here was implying that either - sorry if I came off that way ... Everyone has been very helpful. I truly appreciate and find helpful everyone's posts and advice here.
|
|
|
|
|
